I didn’t even go in the Adoration Chapel, because I didn’t want to disturb the others praying in silence.
This was between me and God.
“Why? Why are You doing this to me? Why are You making my life so miserable? Why, just when I can smell the good thing in front of me, You whisk it away? Isn’t my life bad enough? Isn’t the bi-polar enough? The depression? Isn’t the anxiety enough? Isn’t poverty enough? Why do You do this to me? Why am I so damn special that You feel I need the extra boost toward holiness that You have to ruin everything else in my life so that I have nothing left but You? Can’t You pick on someone else?”
And I can feel Him, even though He’s inside the building, in that golden Monstrance. I can feel the love radiate out in palpable waves.
I bow my head, and say, “Yes.”
*****
Feel free to join me in the NEW Five Minute Friday at Kate Motaung’s place. (General details here.) You can find a bunch of folks who have managed to sit still long enough to scavenge something from the unruly hoard of thoughts. No judging allowed.