My old familiar refrain…

Well, Mrs. Claus is happy today.  All that stuff that had been piling up around her house has been sleighed on over to my place, and she can relax and take it easy for a while I drown in piles of toys.

I have to say, we are in much better shape this December 26 than past years, many of our relatives have learned that with six kids in the house the greatest, most generous gift they can give us is to exercise restraint when shopping for us.  One aunt gives barnes and noble gift cards which will be spent later in the year, and others give one game or DVD for the whole family to enjoy together, and Santa only brought each child one gift this year, but it is amazing how it all starts to add up.  During our September round of birthdays I noticed, to my chagrin, that some toys were open and parts were lost or broken before they ever were properly played with, so I really wanted a careful plan before the new stuff was even into their rooms this time.

Now, when you think about how much stuff my kids have, keep in mind that we also have 3 birthdays in the end of December, so most of our gifts for the entire year are received this week!

I thought I would share what we have decided, in case it would work for your family:
-Each child has two or three new things that they are playing with now/this week

-I declutter throughout the year, but it never seems like enough, especially when the older kids get attached to their stuff.  This afternoon, I have gone through each bedroom and filled a box of stuff to put in the basement.  My children will accept this, but they won’t accept the stuff being thrown out or given away.  Sometime in the spring I think I will quietly purge from the basement boxes, whatever is totally forgotten, or rotate some things back in and put other things away.  I even put some really “good” toys, like wooden blocks, in the basement.  Our boys are in a huge lego phase and the wooden blocks are gathering dust.  Some day when everyone is bored I will re-introduce them.

-I find that the kids play much more creatively when they have fewer choices, and also that they play really well together when there is plenty of open floor space in the play areas of our home.  I keep telling myself this so that I will be strong about the decluttering.

-We filled a huge shelf in the basement with all of the remaining gifts, and we made a deal.  Each Wednesday afternoon we will choose one new thing to pull out, a game, paint set, DVD, toy, coloring book, and we will spend a few hours enjoying it together, including me.   It seemed like my kids were willing to trade instant gratification for the promise of quality time with me, and this should last us well through the winter.  I will have to continue to use restraint in not buying them anything, since we will have a “present” once a week.  I will also have to keep good to my word about being really “present” to them during our “present” time, I know that if I can force myself to ignore the laundry and dishes for a few hours, we will all benefit from the time together.  A new game or activity usually requires some adult supervision, but after we have played it a few times it can become something they use on their own.  I didn’t put books down there, but I might, since a new picture book spread out through the year would also be a treat, while they might just get lost among old favorites on our shelves if I put them away.  If I get really organized, I may even re-wrap these gifts, so we do not know what we are going to choose until we open it!  I think that would be so funny.  This is also going to force some sharing, because they will be opening one gift, and if it was given to someone else, a Lego star wars thing, we are all going to build it together.  They got stationary, so I will put that all together and we will have a letter writing afternoon for everyone.  Another day we will all share someone’s new art supplies, or pretend to dig up dinosaur bones.

This plan will help me with two goals for this winter, the first is to manage our stuff, and the other is to find a semi-structured way to deal with our winter afternoons, since I have not signed up for many outside activities.

Here are a few other ideas that have worked for us in the past:

-Make a toddler box of exciting new things that only comes out when you need them occupied.

-Ask if you can leave a box of toys in a closet at Grandmas house or any other place you visit often.  My kids play so well with the toys at Grandmas because they only see them every few weeks.  I even have a box of toys at my great-grandmothers, we are only there two or three times a year but it is great to know that the kids will have something to do there.

-Make a box or bag of small toys to keep in the car or ready to go when you leave the house.  We once had visitors who brought a toddler and a backpack of small cars, having his own toys made the adjustment to a new setting easier and kept him occupied while his parents socialized.  A small toy or book can save the day when little ones are waiting during activities, sitting in the grocery cart, etc.

I don’t want this talk of decluttering to come off as grinchy or ungrateful, quite the contrary, finding a way to make peace with our stuff has been a large part of my learning to enjoy Christmas.  I used to dread the feeling on December 26th of having to find places for all the new stuff in my small living spaces.  This year, I can focus on being truly grateful for the thought and generosity that went in to each gift and my kids and I can look forward to enjoying them together.