These days, I spend some time with the Blessed Sacrament every school day.
Yesterday, the room was packed, and I had to think with each person coming in, how much my own faith felt fed and strengthened –all these witnesses I could see, coupled with all I could not, made it hard not to feel joyful. When there are many people, I’m moved by the witness of so many, eager to spend time with our Lord. When there are few, and this has happened more than once, it whittles down to me and Jesus. I have to ponder, here God is working triple overtime to get my attention, “Everyone else is gone. Will you just listen Sherry?” to which the answer is probably, “What did you say?”
I sat considering the reality is not that we need to go deeper and deeper in, but that we are immersed and unaware, of just how loved we are –that when we seek to ponder God’s love, it’s us finally not trying to swim out of it. Even distracted is insufficient to make God throw up His hands at us –and that’s good because I hear songs, clips of poetry, conversations, just about everything when my brain spins while I’m trying to “be still and know I am.” Every soul that is, struggles with some form of internal distraction –spiritual ADHD so to speak –that requires we will ourselves to stillness –it’s the one gift we can give.
It’s why I live the rosary and the chaplet –the repetition lets me settle enough to eventually listen, and come to say something other than “What was that?” or “I really need this now.” to God. God doesn’t tire of my list of needs, but He likewise doesn’t feel bullied by them. He just knows I’m needy, and loves me anyway. The rosary lets me say all the needs but in a way that eventually stops me from laundry listing, and lets me laud and listen. The chaplet lets me remember why I’m there. Eventually, I begin praying for more friends to show up, so that Jesus is not left alone. (I know how we are to pray if we must close the monstrance holding the Eucharist).
Fortunately, God knows my worry too, and someone always shows.
The world does not believe much in the reality of God, much less the reality of prayer. Yet there are so many examples. If we believe, then we can know, it never hurts to ask. God is not controlled by our asking, or manipulated by our prayers. Prayer is an exchange of love with the One who is love. It is a crying out of the heart to the Heart that made it. God hears our hearts in every moment. In a sense, prayer is when we admit, we need God, and that we want to Hear Him.
Nothing delights our Lord more, than when we seek His company –even for the smallest of things.
So today, dare to say, “Hello,” to God, and tell Him all your joys, worries and struggles. I promise, He will answer, even if you’re not paying attention, and He doesn’t mind repeating Himself over and over again –like we do in the rosary, to make sure we hear Him.