At the Same Time

Listen to “At the Same Time,” a song by Hilary Weeks, and read about Hilary’s connection with Christ.

The Bitter

I’ve never seen a funeral quite like it.

People filled the chapel, the choir seats, the cultural hall, the Primary and Relief Society rooms—even the hallways were used as “overflow.” I could hardly believe how many people were there. I secretly wondered if that many people would attend my funeral . . . or if I even knew that many people.

Kevin was a beloved man we were temporarily saying goodbye to. He was generous, fun-loving, and devoted to his family, and he lived His life with Christ at the center. He loved his family, his neighbors, his co-workers—and everyone loved him back.

Oh, and he loved Disneyland. More than that, he loved to travel! Photos lined the hallways of the church where the funeral was held. They showed the travels and adventures this man and his family had taken over the years. He truly lived life to the fullest and embraced the things that are most important.

I sang at Kevin’s funeral—we knew each other because his and my daughters were roommates at BYU. As his children spoke at his funeral, I witnessed something incredibly beautiful. Pain and peace. Tears and laughter. Heartache and hope. Tragedy and triumph.

Opposing emotions were in the ring together, so to speak—but instead of battling it out, they were holding hands.

All at the same time.

Kevin’s children celebrated his remarkable life while tears rolled down their cheeks. We laughed as funny memories and stories were shared, even though our hearts were also breaking.

The Sweet

At the same time, I felt peace. I was experiencing the peace of God that Paul talked about in Philippians, which he described as something that “passeth all understanding” but that keeps our “hearts and minds through Jesus Christ” (Philippians 4:7).

I found it hard to describe what I was feeling. It was hard to understand how one heart could feel two ways.

Paul knew.

He knew we would experience unexplainable peace in the middle of our darkest moments. He knew we would feel faith rise above fear. And he knew the source – the Savior. The Savior is the reason we can move forward, keep going, believe and trust when it would otherwise feel impossible.

Opposites are part of God’s plan.

2 Nephi 2:11 says, “For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, my firstborn in the wilderness, righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad. Wherefore, all things must needs be a compound in one; wherefore, if it should be one body it must needs remain as dead, having no life neither death, nor corruption nor incorruption, happiness nor misery, neither sense nor insensibility.”

The Divine

I came home from the funeral and wrote the song “At the Same Time.” It usually takes me a while to write a song, but not this one. The lyrics and melody came quickly. I felt that heaven was involved as I wrote.

I love writing music and lyrics based on powerful experiences surrounded by truth. I love sharing my faith through music.

My favorite line in this song is “There is something so divine, when pain and grace collide.”

It must be divine. How else could we explain surviving the collision of contrasting emotions? It is divine because Jesus Christ is there in the middle. His grace carries us through. He makes sense of the moments when we taste the bitter and the sweet, the moments when we walk where the valley and the mountain meet.

Our connection with the Lord is a lifeline of hope.

He is how we feel the peace of God.