Ask Shaunti
Don’t try to control the process.
Yes, I know it is hard to not drop hints and press. But we heard from many guys that they are motivated by trying to make you happy (and thus by seeing what made you happy before) but not by you trying to push them.
Your man wants to be your hero – not the one who is just doing what he is told.
So merely mention how much you have loved something he did in the past. (“Remember when I got that big account, how you decided to leave work early and take me out to dinner to celebrate? That was so much fun.”) Then let it go, and give your man time and space to come up with romantic ideas and plan things on his own. Let him initiate and follow through with his own style and personality, rather than dropping heavy hints or manipulate him into trying to do something at which he is worried he will fail. Yes, your anniversary might fall at the peak of his work season and go without as much fanfare as you hoped for. But flowers on a different random evening “just because” might be the loveliest moment of your week.
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