Dads, we know you love your daughter. And you know you love your daughter. But you might be surprised at much she needs to hear it. In the research with teens and preteens for For Parents Only, I found that these four phrases have a lot more impact than you might think. And as you’ll see, they are especially powerful and important when coming from a father. Use them often! 1. “I love you, sweetheart.” Until she is married, you... Read more
Have you seen the video of people, wearing white or black shirts, passing a basketball back and forth? Viewers must count how many times the ball is passed by those in white shirts. And even though they are concentrating, they completely miss the obvious. While viewers are looking for the basketball, a woman in a gorilla suit walks into the middle of the players. She faces the camera, beats her chest and walks away. Half the viewers in the original... Read more
So there you are, in your best suit, giving a Skype video presentation in your best professional manner – and thankful that the people on the other end can’t tell you are doing it all from a home office. After all, you have the impressive bookshelf behind you, and the map on the wall. It is all carefully designed to look like you are part of a substantial, well-oiled operation. Suddenly, your small daughter wanders in, and starts dancing around... Read more
There are two types of people in the world: those with the quick zinger and the envious wannabes. I’ve always wished I was more quick-witted at pulling out the perfect sarcastic remark when joking with my friends. But I don’t have the sarcasm gene! Even my attempts to trash talk during family game night are lame. Recently, though, I’ve seen “the perfect zinger” in a completely different light. The results from the research for my newest book The Kindness Challenge showed... Read more
I love that social science now regularly disproves this long-held belief of our culture: that if you are very unhappy in your marriage, it’s better to be realistic and just move on. Because there is very little chance that you will eventually be very happy together. Especially since so few people are happy anyway, right? Wrong. Wrong, wrong wrong! When I wrote The Good News About Marriage, I knew it wouldn’t be a big commercial hit, but I felt absolutely compelled... Read more
Today (January 16, 2017) marks a big day: the launch of the 30-Day Kindness Challenge nationwide! Although you can start it at any time – and will see a marked improvement in your relationships if you do – we encourage people to start TODAY if you can! Why? Thirty days from today is Valentine’s Day. And the 30-Day Kindness Challenge allows you to give the best Valentine’s Day present you’ve ever given: A month-long journal of praise. As you do... Read more
Does your mother-in-law make you want to pull your hair out by criticizing every move you make? Maybe your wife doesn’t appreciate all the things you do for your family, or it’s your husband who takes you for granted and always seems angry. Perhaps you dread going to work every day because your boss talks down to you and you’ve had enough. Or maybe it isn’t a bad relationship, but a good one … and you want it to be... Read more
MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT TONIGHT AT 8 pm ET VIA FACEBOOK LIVE! You know those days when you are so excited about something, you’ve just gotta tell somebody? That is how I feel about what is going on with the new book launch and the 30-day Kindness Challenge initiative that goes with it! First things first: Although no-one knows it yet, The Kindness Challenge, my new book, went on sale this morning!!! Picture me doing a quiet little happy dance over here.... Read more
While doing some research for my next book, I realized something important: when we are angry, most of us handle it wrong! Here are four ways to keep ourselves from (forgive the Marvel reference) turning into a big green rage monster when we otherwise really want to! 1. In advance, realize: “venting” only makes things worse! Most of us have bought into the idea that letting a little steam out of the kettle now prevents it from exploding later, right? And... Read more
I don’t have a lot of pet peeves. But one of the few is when people quote the old urban legend, “Well, you know, the rate of divorce is the same in the church.” Which is one I debunked in my 2014 book, The Good News About Marriage. Really, any urban legend gets under my skin, but this one infuriates me because it is the exact opposite of the truth. As a social scientist who also is a follower of... Read more
Ask Shaunti
Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In