Roseanne Barr is Running for President

Roseanne Barr is Running for President August 13, 2011

As if we don’t have enough crazy people running for president, now Roseanne Barr has thrown her hat into the ring. Roseanne is seriously nuts. I mean bats in the belfry, toys in the attic, weapons grade crazy. Evidence? You want evidence? Okay, here ya go. A lot of this stuff appears to have disappeared from her website, or at least moved to another place, but I cited it and linked to the originals two years ago.

It makes no sense to me that people who have visions must hide for fear of being branded crazed or a witch. I knew from a very early age that I was crazed and a witch by patriarchal definition. I knew too however, because I was shown it by a being from another dimension who appeared to me and said: “You will talk about the (female) Shekkinah and her temple priestess and be a witness for he/she/ it. You are the only one in your world who is not crazy , and you will always need to reverse what is being said and then reverse it double. Here is the code you will use to stay sane in an insane world: You will see signs that tell you that you are right. If you do not see the sign immediately, then it is not a sign. Signs happen immediately and not outside the NOW. The sign that you are right will be: everyone thinks YOU are crazy. They will shake their heads roll their eyes, argue or ignore you, but they will always appear not to listen…the only ones who do listen will be the insane and the drunkard…then you will have reached the higher place, and that is the place where fame and money mean nothing to you…then and only then will you be able to plant the seed of the tree of life, and help to raise an army of the insane who will using their combined insanity, recreate reality as a place so insane that it will actually worship inner peace.”

{I knew at age three that this plane called “existence” was a correction, a punishment, a prison where the realization that witnessing for (christ) Higher Mind meant being cut off from the world. I realized that this place is hell itself, and that we go up and down the ladder of that realization.

At the top of the ladder is the positive negative and at the bottom is the negative positive. In between those two poles are the rungs of consciousness of polarities.

Reviling one of the poles as untouchable allows it to attach to you. (freud said where there is a fear there is a wish). The only way to cure insanity is by paying homage to its’ force field and then telling it about the FACT that it serves sanity not defeats it. How do we do that ? We gird ourselves with a shield called truth, which destroys resistance and we become brave enough to reconcile opposites! When you are using the laser of your mind to witness truth to darkness, you are removing yourself from hell and fulfilling your duty to humanity}.

When those who have no visions regard you as insane, you are assured that you have planted within their reality the seeds that grow completely protected in their dreamstate, and remain dormant there until the dreamer hears the magic word and awakens. The word is: “mind’seye”. (adonai). the mind’s eye is where all battles begin and end, and where the pharmaceutical-military industrial complex now targets as the new battleground….cyberspace on the net. what can be imaged will exist. the age of the graven image is upon us.

And this:

if you are white brown black or saved or pagan, cyborg mormon or chosen here in rw, where weirdos and freaks and undesirable fat old lady folk dwell in the land of the goddess. we gather here as her domestic representatives. we are domestic goddesses. we are hundreds and hundreds and thousands of millions. we are the women who vowed at sinai to defeat the beast in the age of aquarius, and it is written in the future that we did so, as it was written in the past. we are the programmers. we ourselves!!! women are never reincarnated as men. only men are reincarnated as women. being a woman is your last life. this is written in the kaballah. men are always men until they evolve into being women. this they can do by merely serving the mother in them.

And this:

like esther i will fight for my people the jews! Like Judith I will cut off the head of their opposition! like deborah i will prophecy of military intelligence. The nazis have bombed a mosque! these are not jews! these are nazis! the experiment worked the way hitler willed it to work—jews and germans when bred together create a cyborg!!!! with no heart!!!! hashem where are you today? I accuse you! I accuse god today! To have brought the jewish people out of bondage and slavery to sacrifice them on their own altar once again proves your cruelty to your children, and so we are dumping you daddio! we will once again immerge our souls into that which is elemental. In the name of the HOLY motherandfather in heaven, amen. i am david and the beast will fall. i programmed the matrix of cyber, and still do. she who is and is not yet rises further in the green pandomonium!

And the best of them all:

the ark of the covenant is in Iran right now. this was revealed to me in my meditation trance. the goddess spoke to me and said: the brain and soul and heart are being comodified, as were the kidneys. global warming is caused by the rich class’ bidding wars on human organs such as liver and kidneys. this is vampirism at its highest degree, which is:the cannibal. a world of fuzcking canibals has been set loose upon the weary and the meek–bullyism at its height. but then here comes jesus the jew who tells us: refuse to capitulate to the power of church and state combined. thank you jesus, you are a true american spirit, as joseph smith has shown us. joseph smith was indeed an interesting voice for marxist thought. there is a way to combine all the stories and myths now, where never before…they all fit as my research shows me! they are all one god!!! not two and not three. (i am transmitting for a deafened class, i know, but still it is fun to know that irrelevance is its own grand reward. to return to the realms of the unknown, less ego, more sharing, more trust that hashem is leading me to be of aid to the jewish people in how they can hurry up and change and fix themselves of their devotion to seperatism at any cost. i am a jew of the house of david. i am supposed to die with that on my lips. I refute the laws of the jews and of all mankind. i submit totally to the will of the all. it knows its own name and requires no obedience from humanity in any way. It will allow humanity to die quikly and all together in just a few years. there is no stopping it). however, all of the earth’s money was stolen and made a space station for the richest to move on to live in a dome on mars–you all think i am kidding, but i am not kidding! mothergod tells me these things—for you who hate and wish to destroy her biosphere totally, you have now been muthafuckin poned dude! (this is what bucks friends say these days-everything good is gangsta). Its the age of the somali pirates cutting off heads like in a real fucking live disney movie!!! let the people grow hemp and nzi arnie tax that shit!!! hemp will save us grow that and stop smokin the other and there will be peace and solar energy dude—keep workin the story about peace and justice–it could happen today!!! the collapse of capitalism means that the people itself, the public, the mark, the stooge, the victim, {the meek} have indeed inherited the earth and outer space too! it’s terrible nazi architects are all about to die of old age. they fear no hell for themselves, and think death is oblivion, but its not its consciousness they will reincarnate as rocks, and wait inside a blackhole of consciousness for a completely new being that can contain its plastic and dead heart. it clones itself.

Cuckoo for cocoa puffs.

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  • Aquaria

    Roseanne is seriously nuts. I mean bats in the belfry, toys in the attic, weapons grade crazy.

    It is well-known that Barr has a long history of mental health problems. She was apparently in a very bad car accident when she was a teenager that caused a brain injury which in turn caused her to be institutionalized, at least once. Most likely, she had only enough of a recovery to let her out.

    Knowing that, stuff like this makes me pity her–and her minders.

  • schism

    She sounds about as sane as Michele Bachmann, honestly.

  • bigjohn756

    When I saw her announce her candidacy on Leno last Thursday(8/4) it was so bizarre that thought that she was just trying to be funny. Then, when it turned out that she wasn’t very funny, I thought that she was invoking Poe’s Law. Oh, well, wrong again.

  • Tabby Lavalamp

    Replace it all with God, Jesus, Satan, angels, demons, and End Times, and she could probably run on the GOP ticket (except for the Israel thing).

    If I were living south of the border and was a citizen, depending on who the Greens run I’d consider tossing her my protest vote.

  • ManOutOfTime

    She is right on one thing: we do live in a world of fuzcking canibals!

    The brilliant premise of Jonathan Katz’s cartoon show, Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist, was that stand up comedy is just a bunch of crazy people telling you what they really think. Roseanne is a truly original talent, in a league with Joan Rivers and Elaine May in terms of breakthrough female comics. So I’m not so surprised — but I had no idea she was so far gone. Hopefully no one gets hurt.

  • raven

    She sounds about as sane as Michele Bachmann, honestly.

    Sure, but a lot more interesting and a lot less scary.

    Bachmann’s brand of fundie xian crazy has historically gotten tens of millions of people killed.

    Including the Roseanne Barrs of the world. A few centuries ago, Roseanne would have been burnt at the stake as a witch while the Bachmanns of the day cheered.

  • I’ve always thought it was kind of sad what happened to her. I agree with the last commenter, she really is talented. When she first got famous, she was genuinely very funny, a real breath of fresh air in a field dominated by men. I’ve always felt that she just got too big too fast and wasn’t prepared for it. I felt the same way about Sam Kinison, though they handled it in very different ways — Sam by self-destructing with drugs and alcohol and Roseanne by barricading herself inside her own head. But that’s just armchair psychology from a distance, so it may be totally wrong.

  • lordshipmayhem

    Actually, Roseanne Barr sounds far more sane and grounded in reality than the combined Republican candidates for President. Scary thought, that.

  • hatmaker

    Wow, I had no idea. And just last week I caught her new show (Roseanne’s Nuts) while flipping channels. She sure didn’t seem crazy like this. Still funny as ever – even apologized for that whole National Anthem fiasco. To be so messed up on the inside like that…shudder.

  • Nomen Nescio

    lots of mental issues are episodic, with periods of remission and relapse. she likely isn’t quite this far gone all the time, or at least for her sake we can hope so.

  • ErkLR
  • Michael Heath

    Sam Kinison joins Richard Pryor as an exemplar of the tortured broken soul which results in great comedy. I ached for him at the same time I laughed.

  • harold

    I know some non-mentally ill people who believe in reincarnation and think that this “plane” is “hell”. I don’t believe in reincarnation, to put it mildly, but these are people who aren’t clinically mentally ill.

    The Israel stuff is grotesque and offensive hyperbole, but she doesn’t literally think that the Israeli government is “Nazi” in a concrete sense. I’m not anti-Israel, but I am as against Israeli human rights abuses as I am against any other human rights abuses (including the quantitatively far more and usually qualitatively worse US human rights abuses).

    The “vision” stuff suggests serious brain illness, although undiagnosed epilepsy would be as likely as a mental illness to cause that.

    Still much less harmful, and no crazier, than most of the Republican candidates.

  • Fifth Dentist

    As a Georgia resident I was considering writing in Bugs Bunny. There could be worse alternatives than Roseanne on one or both of the major parties’ tickets this year.

  • twincats

    there is a way to combine all the stories and myths now, where never before…they all fit as my research shows me! they are all one god!!!

    Dr. Bronner, paging Dr. Bronner…

    Seriously, she should be writing their new soap labels!

  • Spunmunkey

    As others have commented – like this crazy is any worse than the Xtian dominionist crap other candidates are spewing. Hell, if she got John Goodman to run as VP…