Virgin Mary Appears in New York Tree

Virgin Mary Appears in New York Tree July 22, 2012

The Virgin Mary continues her very successful 2012 North American Tour (sadly, without Madonna as an opening act) by appearing in a tree in New York, with fans sleeping overnight in front of Ticketmaster outlets to get front row seats for the show.

Despite yesterday’s heat, dozens of people flocked to see the “Virgin Mary tree” near the corner of 60th Street and Bergenline Avenue in West New York.

All afternoon, crowds surrounded the tree, which some say appears to carry an image of the Virgin Mary.

Since the image was first discovered in the tree last week, a large shrine of candles and flowers has grown around the tree…

The image has touched off a worldwide craze, with outlets across the country and the world picking up the story of the “Virgin Mary tree.” The media sensation has spurred a steady pilgrimage to the tree.

Maria Medina came from Hoboken yesterday to see the “Virgin Mary tree” for herself.

“I’m not really sure if it’s actually her,” said Medina, who’s Catholic.

Really? You’re not sure? Here’s a clue: It isn’t. She’s dead. But I’ll leave it to the Protestants to answer them:

Michael Oquendo, who was jogging by yesterday incensed some in the crowd when he shouted that the vigil was a form of “idolatry” and compared it to sins referenced in the Bible.

He ended his rant by shouting “may a lightning bolt strike that tree down,” prompting cheers of “Amen!” from some in the crowd as well as angry comments.

Two older men began shouting at Oquendo in Spanish, and one of them grabbed his hand and tried to push him away from the scene.

An officer broke up the confrontation.

“I was simply preaching the word in the Bible,” Oquendo said. “I respect other people’s faith and their right to their beliefs, but this is a little crazy.”

But you share 99% of their beliefs. How amusing.

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  • Pierce R. Butler

    Mary clearly deserves a prize for the Oldest Virgin in New York.

  • dingojack

    Virgin Mary Appears in New York Tree

    Was the virgin Mary treed by dogs, or did a squirrel spot her and think she looked a little nuts?

    (Or perhaps it’s one of those off, off, off Broadway productions).

    Dingo

  • Silly idolaters!

  • xmnr

    Nitpick: West New York is in New Jersey

  • “I respect other people’s faith and their right to their beliefs, but this is a little crazy.”

    No, you don’t. Maybe the second part, but not the first. And that’s fine. It is a little crazy. But don’t pretend you have any respect for other beliefs when you are yelling at them that you’re sure the invisible sky fairy will be offended rather than delighted by people worshipping a tree that has an image of a dead,potentially fictional woman in it.

  • skinnercitycyclist

    I liked the part concerning all the overtime the cops are racking up to guard this thing. Oh, and the fundie nutjob who thinks the Catholics are crazy….

  • jameshanley

    There’s a misprint. It was actually the vagina of Mary, in a crotch of the tree.

  • Meanwhile, Mary Magdalene is pissed off. Once more she manifests her image, and what does everyone do? Think it’s Jesusmom.

  • I was in a gentleman’s club last, well, some time back and I’m POSITIVE that I saw JESUSMOM pole dancing. What, that’s sacreligious!? Well, fuck me, I’ll just say she was on a burrito.

  • I’m definitely going to see the Virgin Mary Tree. I was unable to get out to see the Abraham Lincoln squirrel before it was assassinated, and I don’t want to feel that sort of disappointment again.

  • cag

    They know it was an image of the virgin mary by the wooden expression on her face. Gives a new meaning to the term “family tree”. If they don’t get to the root of this, it will leave the church to branch out into carving a niche for themselves. The idea of the goddists stumping their beliefs makes me want to pack my trunk and go live in the forest. All bite and no bark, only saps would stand on such a plank.

    Remember: as you saw so shall you chop.

  • d cwilson

    Has the tree ever been pollinated? Well then, it ain’t the Virgin Mary!

    Slut.