Delgaudio: Gays Trying to Kill Me, Send Money!

Delgaudio: Gays Trying to Kill Me, Send Money! October 4, 2013

I seem to have been removed from Eugene Delgaudio’s mailing list, since I haven’t received one of his hilariously melodramatic emails in a while. But JoeMyGod is still getting them and reprints the latest one. It’s full of that childish pathos one has learned to expect from him:

“Dear Joe, It’s hard to write you this. My office is in trouble. And I need your help. I have been fighting overtime against the radical Homosexual Lobby and they are making huge gains in Washington. Today, I’m worried.This is a painful letter for me to write. I feel as if my pro-Family supporters are letting me down. Life here in Washington has been a virtual Hell for me. I put off sending you this letter for a while because I didn’t want to worry you. You see, I’ve gotten death threats and I never take them lightly. But when they go beyond threatening and actually try to kill me, it’s a whole different story. In the past, strangers followed my family around town. Idling cars sit across the street at all hours of the night. The threatening phone calls, the death threats and the outrageous lies, oh, it’s endless. But now, my friend, I need to count on you. I absolutely must raise over $65,325 in the next 25 days to pay past bills and keep programs going. Joe, I need to be able to count on you for a special gift of $35 or more. If I am not able to raise the money, I don’t know what I will do. I don’t know how I can keep fighting. Tammy Baldwin and her cronies in the radical Homosexual Lobby have gone into overdrive to seduce Republicans in Congress into backing their perverse agenda. If your Public Advocate falters now, the radical Homosexual Lobby may get everything they want.”

One of my oldest friends used to own a direct mail company that did fundraising campaigns for conservative groups in DC. He told me about the psychological techniques used in those campaigns. His favorite was the “it’s 3 am and I can’t sleep, because of (fill in the blank — illegal immigration, abortion, gay rights, etc) and the impending doom it promises if you don’t send us money immediately” letter. The televangelist version is “it’s 3 am and I can’t sleep because God has put a burden on my heart.”

"Thanks for being so forthright."

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