‘Third Eagle of the Apocalypse’ Warns Atheists to ‘Wake Up’

‘Third Eagle of the Apocalypse’ Warns Atheists to ‘Wake Up’ September 19, 2014

William Tapley, the self-declared “third eagle of the apocalypse” (whatever the hell that is), has a warning for atheists. He says God is sending all kinds of warnings to the world, contained in “music videos, television commercials, even sporting events.” If God wanted to send a message, why not just send it? Why hide it in music videos where only someone like Tapley will use his secret decoder ring to interpret it?


Browse Our Archives

Follow Us!

What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • lofgren

    Duh. That’s God’s way of proving that Tapley really is a prophet. Checkmate, atheists!

  • chilidog99

    He is right. God speaks through television commercials. Right now, Maxwell the Geico pig is messenger.

  • How is it that this guy is walking the streets unsupervised?

    America, you are surely in trouble when lunatics like Tapley is considered a prophet.

    How about, “Hey, look at the crazy man!”.

  • greg1466

    So since Simpson finished first, what’s going to happen on 11/9?

  • otrame

    Oh, janiceintoronto, we don’t take ol’ Billy seriously. He’s just a You Tube nut. I mean he only has 13,000 subscribers.

    Many of those 13,000 are probably laughing at him.

    However, I will give him this much: He doesn’t disable commenting, like most hyper-religious types do. Unlike many others, I think Bill is absolutely dead serious.

    Poor thing.

  • raven

    As the Second Cat Caretaker of the Post-Apocalypse, I can assure you that it doesn’t count, unless you…play it backwards.

    The spirits only speak in reverse.

    This has been known since the 1970’s.

  • tfkreference

    This is the guy whose highly analytical mind found satanic messages in the Miracle Whip commercial about deviled eggs. Genius.

  • Which god? Not even Christians all worship the same one.

  • teawithbertrand

    Doesn’t he call himself the “Co-prophet of the end times”, implying that there’s more than one? Does the other guy just not have a you tube channel?

  • John Pieret

    Why hide it in music videos where only someone like Tapley will use his secret decoder ring to interpret it?

    For the same reason he hid all those codes in the Bible … people are gullible!

  • #9 teawithbertrand

    Good point, so who, exactly, is the other co-prophet. Is the job still open?

    With enough of the right drugs, I could probably fill the position.

    Can there be a Canadian co-prophet, or is U.S. Citizenship mandatory? After all, everyone -knows- God is an American.

    Send money now.

  • John Pieret

    By the way, there is a handy summary of why he is the Third Eagle and Co-Prophet here:


  • culuriel

    Well, I barely watch music videos, mute all commercials, and avoid watching most sporting events. Wouldn’t his god want to send me a message in a medium I might actually watch? If his god used, say The Walking Dead, I might get the message.

  • blf

    “Third Eagle of the Apocalypse” sounds like the evil counterpart of the Great Eagles who helped rescue Frodo and Sam.

  • I’ll wake up as soon as I get my atheist coffee in a secular mug …

    Ed asks,

    If God wanted to send a message, why not just send it?

    Because the Christian god is one of the weakest deities out there. He’s incompetent to an astounding degree, sending punishments to the wrong place at the wrong time. His faithful followers are killed right along with the sinners. His messages are obscure and indirect, but, apparently, he gets pissed when people don’t understand them. Personally, I think he needs some communication coaching and perhaps some relationship therapy. “You should know what I mean without my having to spell it out” is really bad news in a relationship.

    People constantly say “won’t someone take a stand for Jesus?” Jesus is either a demi-god or an avatar; in either case, he should be able to stand up for himself. Heck, my sons could stand up for themselves at an early age. Is Jesus 3 or something that he can’t stand up for himself?

    In Mark 14:7 Jesus even admits that he can’t accomplish what should be a simple task for a deity, saving the poor. Instead, he makes it all about him. “For ye have the poor with you always, and whensoever ye will ye may do them good: but me ye have not always.” (KJV) What a narcissistic wuss.

  • DaveL

    After all, everyone -knows- God is an American.

    I heard it from David Bowie, it must be true.

  • congenital cynic

    Sometimes when I watch his videos I think he’s surely taking the piss out of everyone, having a bit of fun and laughing his ass off at the folks who believe his crap. Nobody could be that fucking daft. But then I shake my head and say, “yeah, there are a lot of people who are that daft”. And then I despair over the state of humanity. On the plus side, as someone else said, he’s pretty harmless.

  • dhall

    If this ‘third eagle of the apocalypse’ really, really represents god, then either god is a seriously stupid deity, or god is slowly shaking his head and wondering how to compel this one to retire so he can replace him with a competent representative . . .

    It also makes you wonder about the other two eagles . . .

  • dhall

    He’s also not much of a prophet if someone else had to “alert” him to this “obvious” sign from god. And his calling the attack on 9/11 a “prophecy” rather than a warning or harbinger is sort of weird, even more than a decade after the fact.

    OMG, a flag falls down and it’s a dire warning!

    I like his little dig at atheists as well–what do we expect? God to tap us on the shoulder? Why should we get special treatment? Sure, why not. A tap on the shoulder would certainly constitute some proof that the tapper exists.

  • hexidecima

    so, this god is finally getting into “mass communication”. gee, onlya couple of decades after Rice and Weber suggested it 🙂

  • some bastard on the internet

    dhall @19

    Sure, why not. A tap on the shoulder would certainly constitute some proof that the tapper exists.

    Uh, helloooooooo?

    William Tapley

    Checkmate, atheists!

  • Akira MacKenzie

    I only listen to the Lone Locust of the Apocalypse! (Think of me when you look to the night sky!)

  • Akira MacKenzie

    Awwwwww, crap! All that set up ruined by an HTML fail!

    Anyway… here’s the clip.