Pat Robertson, always quick with incredibly helpful advice, did a story on the 700 Club about a woman who used to be a stripper until Jesus saved her. Ol’ Pat has a message for all women who may have had sex in unapproved ways on how to cleanse themselves with the blood of the lamb.
“How many men — dozens — has she had relations with?” Robertson wondered. “How many had ogled her naked body as she was dancing, how many had groped at her, and fondled her, and made obscene remarks about her, and used her?”
“And yet, Jesus Christ looked at Polly and said, ‘Polly, you’re clean,” the televangelist continued.
Robertson asked the female viewers of his show what they had done to make themselves “sinners.”
“Have you done something that you’re ashamed of? Have you had an abortion? Have you murdered somebody? Have you had multiple sex partners and you’re ashamed of it? Have you caught some sexual disease? What have you done?”
The TV preacher then offered “the opportunity to say yes,” and to take God’s “free gift” of “cleansing.”
Robertson concluded with an upsell: “What if you sin in the future after this, what happens to you? And what happens when the Lord comes back, what about his Second Coming?”
I’ll tell you this much, Pat. There isn’t a stripper or porn star in the world with more to be ashamed of than you. They may have fucked more people than you think they should, but you’ve fucked millions and millions of desperate and credulous people out of their money. I would never use the word “whore” to apply to them, but I’ll sure as hell use it for you.