A Christmas Card Inspired by Glenn Beck

A Christmas Card Inspired by Glenn Beck December 20, 2014

Glenn Beck is making a movie about Santa Claus being a badass warrior who protects the baby Jesus from harm and now a Washington, DC gun lobbyist has apparently turned that into inspiration for a Christmas card featuring Santa killing a Muslim terrorist with a gun.


From the press release:

An armed Santa Claus on an original Christmas card sent to recipients this year by John M. Snyder protects Baby Jesus from a masked, knife-wielding terrorist.

Santa aims a semiautomatic handgun at the terrorist near Baby Jesus in His crib. The contemporary drawing shows Santa Claus using the gun to save the Infant from the throat-cutter.

“The Christmas card reflects current reality,” Snyder said. “According to numerous news reports, Islamist terrorists behead innocent victims around the world, even here in the United States. These murderers persecute Christians, especially Catholics, who worship Jesus Christ as the Son of God, the Second Person of the Blessed Trinity.

“At Christmas, we commemorate the coming of Jesus Christ as true God and true Man, the Divine Person who assumed our human nature through his mother Mary.”

Snyder added that, “Santa Claus for many represents the Christmas spirit, the spirit of giving. On this message, Santa uses force of arms to rescue Baby Jesus from a terrorist, to give the Infant protection and freedom from the terrorist. Governments and other entities worthy of respect appreciate the right and ability of individuals to use firearms to protect the innocent.”

It’s probably important to note that this is not a parody. He’s serious.

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  • dingojack

    Why is Santa trying to shoot a Ninja?


  • Alverant

    Looks more like a sheikh is protecting Jesus from a gun-wielding child molester dressed up as Santa.

  • Muslims are beheading Christians here in America? Did I miss a news item? The only recent beheading incident I’m aware of on American soil involved a Christian decapitating his roommate for practicing “witchcraft.”

  • blf

    Muslims are beheading Christians here in America?

    Only those who don’t die of Ebola or Obamacare first.

  • comfychair

    That card is clearly unfinished. For instance, the 9/11 Crying Freedom Never Forget Eagle isn’t shown perched on the roof of the manger. Also Baby Jesus’ gun isn’t pictured. Santa’s Navy SEAL arm patch is missing.

  • frankb

    I’m with Alverant. I see a frightened parent or other relative trying to hold a steady knife against a gun toting foreign intruder. Jesus was supposedly born in Palestine, not Sweden.

  • It’s probably important to note that this is not a parody. He’s serious.

    We all know that Santa keeps the Muslins away from Jesus. That’s just common sense.

  • Nevermind that Islam didn’t exist for centuries after the time period alleged here. Not like historical facts ever stopped people like this, anyway. Hey, why not just claim the guys who called for Jesus’ crucifixion were secret Muslims, too. Maybe they got their hands on a time machine.

  • raven

    Why isn’t the Moslem terrorist who is 7 centuries anachronistic, pointing a gun too?

    In the real world, the bad guys are just as likely to have guns as…the good guys. I don’t see that Al Qaeda, the Taliban, or ISIL are running around with knives. They seem to have quite a collection of explosives, bombs, and firearms.

  • raven


    The Massacre of the Innocents is the biblical narrative of infanticide by Herod the Great, the Roman-appointed King of the Jews. According to the Gospel of Matthew,[1] Herod ordered the execution of all young male children in the vicinity of Bethlehem, so as to avoid the loss of his throne to a newborn King of the Jews whose birth had been announced to him by the Magi.

    According to the Magic Book of Mythology, something like this really did happen after jesus was born.

    King Herod slaughtered all the boys in Bethlehem under two to try to kill baby jesus.

    Of course, baby jesus wasn’t defended by gun wielding Santas or even angels with flaming swords. The family was tipped off by an angel and fled to Egypt.

    This is found only in Matthew and contradicts the rest of the NT and all of history. All but the fundies regard it as myth that didn’t happen.

  • caseloweraz

    Michael Brew: Never mind that Islam didn’t exist for centuries after the time period alleged here.

    Not to mention semiautomatic handguns — or Santa, for that matter.

  • caseloweraz

    Judging by the apparent position of his feet on that card, if Santa takes another step he’ll trip himself. Just sayin’.

  • D. C. Sessions

    Hey, why not just claim the guys who called for Jesus’ crucifixion were secret Muslims, too. Maybe they got their hands on a time machine.

    Well, they were reputed to be Palestinian.

  • Anri

    Clearly, Santa’s outfit is dyed red with the blood of heretics.

    “You better not pout,

    you better not cry,

    you better not convert to Islam,

    I’m telling you why:

    Santa Claus will shoot you in the face!”

    I presume these folks shared this lovely card with their kids and their classmates?

    Yes? No? I do wonder…

  • Sastra

    Since the Church of Satan has had such luck with their interesting entries for the “open forum” holiday displays on government property, I say that that a newly created ‘Church of Santa’ ought to adopt this as a poster and hurry up with their applications.

    It can’t be offensive because it’s Christian.

  • I would like to see someone commission an installation like that for dispaly at some town hall that designates a space as an open forum.

  • thebookofdave

    The velociraptor is conspicuously absent.

  • John Pieret

    Didn’t we just have that preacher telling us Santa is really Satan? Maybe the nice, brave gentleman in the headscarf is risking his life to save Baby Jesus from a gun-toting Prince of Lies, even though he only has a knife against the Satanic gun.

  • vereverum

    So, wouldn’t the central image be considered a graven image and therefore in direct violation of the second commandment?

  • dingojack

    vereverum – it’s all OK, as long as he didn’t press the pen down too hard… 😉


  • lordshipmayhem

    I guess it IS true, Santa Claus DID conquer the Martians.

  • dingojack

    In case the stupid slide-in ads send me completely nuts before the 25th of December:




    * The Magic Roundabout, Swindon, London.

  • marcus

    Stoopid Muslin! Bringing a knife to a gunfight!!

  • Steven


    As far as I know there is one example of a Muslim beheading an American in the US: http://ktla.com/2014/09/26/man-beheads-woman-in-oklahoma-workplace-after-dispute-officials/

    In other news, apparently Baby Jesus has the mumps.

  • vereverum

    @ Steven #24

    Oddly enough, both incidents happened in Oklahoma. Obviously an Equal Opportunity state.

  • @marcus #23

    Does that mean Santa is going to die by machine gun from the knife wielders’ off screen accomplice?

  • imst

    Wasn’t this a South Park episode like 15 years ago?

  • Can’t we have just one Christmas without Dad and Grandma bickering about the food, Uncle James getting embarrassingly drunk, and right-wingers making expressions of hatred and violence?

  • sabrekgb

    @17 bookofdave

    The velociraptor is conspicuously absent.

    Win. -Raptor Jesus

    Also, crappy card, and not very helpful to gun rights in general. Ah, well.

  • caseloweraz

    You know, my macabre side wonders if cards like this might become a small but significant subset of the holiday greetings industry. If that happens, we’ll need modern Christmas carols to match:

    If Jesus had wanted for any wee thing,

    A star in the sky or a bird on the wing,

    Or a gun-toting Santa for Muslim-killing

    He surely could have it, ’cause he was the King.

    Or how about—

    Good king Wenceslas looked out

    When the bomb exploded.

    Took his Desert Eagle out;

    It was always loaded.

    Forth he went to save the day,

    Though the foe was bitter;

    Blew the terrorists away

    Like so much leaf-litter.