Chuck Norris Reaches Out to the Youth of America

Chuck Norris Reaches Out to the Youth of America January 27, 2015

Partially fossilized has-been Chuck Norris thinks he knows the secret to wooing the young people of this country to vote Republican. Sure, they disagree with the right on most things that matter, but if he could just talk to them about some very important platitudes he’d like them to repeat ad nauseum, he could totally win them over.

I understand millennials are generally independent but vote Democratic, are less conservative and more liberal, believe in marriage equality and climate change, are more anti-death penalty and guns, more pro-marijuana legalization and big government solutions and are neither particularly patriotic nor religious.

Yet, I know millennials love their country, believe in governmental activism, know the power of local community involvement, are open to truth and willing to be challenged and have never been more disillusioned with President Obama and his fellow Democrats as they are today…

Of course, disillusionment and dissatisfaction with predecessors is key to winning any election. It is virtually equivalent to the value of having the right candidate.

I’m just gonna stop there admire the sheer nothingness of that last paragraph. What does it mean? What could it possibly mean? It’s gibberish. It’s someone really dumb trying to sound smart.

Therefore, I believe, the next two years – prior to the 2016 election – We the People have a unique ability to help change our country by reaching out to young people in our own lives and our circles of influence. We shouldn’t wait for our political party or presidential candidate to lead the way in reaching young voters before we try. At the very least, as parents and grandparents, we need to be the primary models, mentors and motivators in the lives of youth and not leave those roles to other educators or influencers.

As trusted loved ones and friends, we need to educate, inspire and challenge millennials to fight for what’s right in America, not merely what might be generationally favored, socially expedient or of personal interest. We must remind them of the importance of our republic’s history and legacy, and all of our duty to set aside self and uphold the founding tenets of our country, to fight to preserve what has been handed to us. If we lay the groundwork in young people’s lives, they will be more apt to align themselves with a candidate who does the same, even if he or she runs on a platform a bit contrary to their generational preferences or agenda.

A couple things. First, if you use the phrase “we the people” constantly when talking about politics, I’m going to assume you’re a moron. I have yet to have that rule prove inaccurate. Secondly, the rest of this is just empty catchphrases. On actual issues, most young people simply do not agree with Chuck Norris and the Republicans. They know gay people, they like them and are friends with them and they don’t want to see them discriminated against — and they think those who do are clueless, out of touch, immoral jerks. And they’re right.

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