Roy Moore Can’t Make Ends Meet

Roy Moore Can’t Make Ends Meet March 5, 2018

Failed Republican Senatorial candidate and Christian fascist Roy Moore is broke, or so he claims. Faced with a lawsuit from one of the many women he called liars when they made allegations against him for his jailbait trolling, he’s now begging for money to pay his legal fees. From his Facebook page:

I have no regrets! Together we fought the good fight, we finished our course, and we have kept the faith. And we do not intend to quit! The future of our children and grandchildren is at stake.

And by “our children and grandchildren,” of course, he means “my future dating prospects.

I now face another vicious attack from lawyers in Washington D. C. and San Francisco who have hired one of the biggest firms in Birmingham Alabama to bring another legal action against me and ensure that I never fight again.

However, I will trust God that he will allow truth to prevail against the unholy forces of evil behind their attack.

I have lawyers who want to help but they are not without cost and besides their fees, legal expenses could run over $100,000. I have had to establish a “legal defense fund, anything you give will be appreciated…

My resources have been depleted and I have struggled to make ends meet, but I have not lost my faith in our God, who is our true source of strength and will never leave or forsake us.

Don’t worry, Roy, God may foresake you but I never will. I’m sending an emergency box of thoughts and prayers to you immediately. Perhaps you can turn them into some sort of cryptocurrency and exchange them for dollars and use them to pay your legal fees. Or perhaps you should just learn to manage your money better. Let’s take a look at your income sources, shall we?

Despite the fact that you were forcibly removed from office twice from the Alabama Supreme Court, you have a $135,000 a year pension from it. Then there’s the $180,000 salary from the organization you founded, the Foundation for Moral Law, and the more than a million dollars you and your wife received from your own group as “consultants.” Either you or your wife was still getting a salary from that group in 2014. We’d know whether that’s still the case, but you apparently refused to file your form 990s with the IRS in 2015 and 2016.

Look, I know it’s probably really expensive to buy teddy bears and Jonas Brothers CDs for all the teenage girls who hang out at the malls you haven’t yet been banned from, but maybe if you put yourself on a budget you could scrape by on more than $10,000 a month in income.

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