Bachmann: God Answered Our Prayers with Trump

Bachmann: God Answered Our Prayers with Trump September 24, 2018

The terminally stupid Michele Bachmann, who has declared herself the “pastor to the United Nations,” says that God answered their prayers with Donald Trump’s election, which she claims ushered in “an unparalleled golden time” for America. It’s almost cute that someone could believe that, isn’t it?

“Two years ago, I believe that the prayers that God’s people made to ask God for his provision were heard,” Bachmann said. “They were heard and granted and for two years, we have lived in an unparalleled golden time in the United States.”

“We are living in an unparalleled golden time,” she repeated. “We have a president who has made the most pro-life actions of any president ever. We have a president who has been the most pro-Israel president ever in the history of the United States of America. Our president has put the United States on a pathway of blessing … We have the most pro-religious liberty president in the history of the United States, ever!”

“Do you see what a golden day that we have been given?” Bachmann asked. “On every possible level, America is killing it. We are doing great in every possible metric, and I believe that’s because God’s people utilized the tool that he gave us.”

Okay, so how did God answer those prayers? Did he change the votes of people who would otherwise not have voted for Trump? If so, what happened to that “free will” thing you always fall back on as an excuse for bad things happening? And if not, what exactly did God do to make it happen? We’ll wait while you fumble for a coherent answer. And what happened to all those previous prayers? You had millions and millions of people praying that Obama wouldn’t be elected, that he would be removed from office somehow, even that he would be killed, and it didn’t happen. Why didn’t God answer those prayers? Oh right, I forgot — “mysterious ways.” Yeah, ways that look exactly like he doesn’t exist and there was no intervention at all.

"I really want him booted out but I'm also afraid of what his nuttier followers ..."

Trump Inauguration Funds Laundered through Friends ..."
"More like an acting temp Director of the OMB."

Trump Turns to Mulvaney as ‘Acting’ ..."
"Because he can pretend to still be wealthy even though he's a broke ass SOB.Donald ..."

Trump Inauguration Funds Laundered through Friends ..."

Browse Our Archives

Follow Us!


TRENDING AT PATHEOS Nonreligious
What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment