CONTROL: Part Four

So, if there actually very little about our lives that we do control (our behavior, our attention, our intentions) how in the world do we actually create the life that we want?

Take a moment to think back through your life. Notice the path that brought you to this very moment: the perfection of the unfolding of events; the “coincidences” that placed the perfect opportunities in front of you in just the right timing; the clear step-by-step through time that, in retrospect, gave you exactly what you needed when you needed it. It might not have been pretty or easy, but it got you here.

As you notice how your life has worked out, check in with yourself. How much did you “controlling” your life actually have to do with where you are now? And, if the results you’re getting aren’t because of your careful maneuverings, what are they actually due to?

As we strip away the illusion of being in control of our lives, we come face-to-face with the reality that we can align with the forces of creation, but we certainly do not control them. Imagine your life as a flower. You might decide where to plant the seed; you can nurture the seedling with your attention, and have something to do with making sure it has enough water and sunlight. But the actual growth of the flower is purely in the arena of the real creative force: Nature.

Similarly, once we give up trying to control what is happening around us, we can tune into coming into greater harmony with how to co-create with Nature. Instead of spending our time and energy on trying to control what we can’t (everyone and everything beyond our behavior, attention, and intention) we can put our attention on what supports this co-creation.

What maximizes this co-creativity?

• Being in integrity (lining up our thoughts, feelings, words, and deeds) so that we don’t leak out the energy that could support the growth of our dreams.
• Using our loving attention to nurture ourselves from the inside.
• Getting clear about our intentions (so Nature knows which flower to help us grow).
• Noticing and appreciating how the energy of Nature is available to us to support our creations.

Giving up the illusion of control allows you to open to the exhilaration of the ultimate ride: The boat of your life is built solid with your integrity, and is nimble and responsive from your loving attention. The clarity of your intentions then allow you to steer with the vast and endless stream of universal energy. The thrill is in having no idea where this ride will take you.