S.E.W.-ing your way out of power struggle

Here’s the single skill that will end the most difficult of power dynamics: S.E.W. In my post called “Power Dynamics: We know ’em when when we see ’em,” I described how lapsing into instinctive power differences is what behind every relationship conflict. While the magical experience of falling in love is what draws most couples together, the honeymoon ends when one person tries to control the other. Since no one–literally no one, beginning with infants who are old enough to have a… Read more

Believe your true knowing (instead of the news)

Have you wondered what you can believe lately? What I think? Believe you. Unearth the you that is ever-present underneath all the years of conditioning, and believe what you know. I’ve heard it over and over, have you? These times are unprecedented. We’ve never had a POTUS like this, a government as dysfunctional. Meanwhile, the intensity of animosity within our country seems unmatched, the level of hostility unparalleled. Of course, there is no way to measure any of this. The Internet, and… Read more

Influence through physiology: From power struggle to flow

Do you want to know how to truly influence those around you? How to move out of control battles and find ways for everyone to get everything they want? There really is a way to do this–and it will take you right into that magic river of flow. Let’s do an experiment. Imagine that I’ve got my hand out, with fingers up and palm facing you. As you visualize putting your hand up against mine, now feel me push against you…. Read more

Building a friendly universe one inner state at a time

Does one’s inner state really matter that much? What if what is going on inside of you really is all that matters? Find out more…   I recently asked “Do You Live in a Friendly Universe?”. In that blog post, I reflected on the importance of one’s inner state and how to connect in with a larger, expanded reality. A reader, Samantha, posed this thoughtful comment: “…I’d like to point out a couple of caveats that are important when are approaching any… Read more

Want to get out of the Triangle with politics?

  You may have seen my blog challenging you to stop consuming two types of news, and then to add in a daily dose of creativity creativity. (Here’s that post.)  I took my own advice. I stopped watching Rachel Maddow, and I stopped reading Huffington Post.  What a relief. I added in creative time nearly every day. I painted watercolors, I played my guitar, went to Paint ‘n Sip at the BC3. Here’s my painting: We went to the new Boulder Michael’s craft store… Read more

Power dynamics: We know ’em when we see ’em

  Today I’m sharing my biggest discovery, culled out of over 40,000 hours of working with clients. All problems in relationships come from entangled power dynamics. I’ve tried so many approaches to getting issues to shift, both with my clients and in my own relationship. Speaking the other’s love language. Watching the ratio of criticisms to appreciations. Feeling empathy for the other’s hidden wounds and saying the right healing words. Responding to bids for attention. Reflective listening. Enjoying new experiences together. All… Read more

A challenge from the EEPs!

  One of the main challenges of our work has been to find something that people like better than the rush they get from adrenaline. And we’ve found it–creative expression. –Kathlyn Hendricks, Ph.D   Are you up for something that might push you a little, but will ultimately help you feel better and better? Keep reading… I lead a group called “Embodiers of Evolutionary Power.” The acronym is fun to play with (especially if you make it “People Embodying Evolutionary Power”–particularly timely… Read more

Today, forgiveness

Forgive: The sense of “to give up desire or power to punish” (late Old English) . -–Online Etymological Dictionary  Our species has a proclivity for revenge, for punishment. We tend to be concrete and literal: if I’m ok, then you do something and I experience pain, it makes sense to me to blame you and then believe you deserve to be punished. It seems reasonable, doesn’t it? Unfortunately, this paradigm immediately disempowers me as I totally miss all the ways… Read more

Do you live in a friendly universe? Redux

I wrote this back in January, 2015. As I was meditating this morning, it occurred to me that my attention has shifted back to focusing on what I see as the unfriendly aspects of the universe–chemical warfare, warmongering, political strife, potentially irreversible climate change–what is wrong. And I know that, once I go into Narrow Focus, there is always something else to find that is “wrong.”  The full quote from Albert Einstein is:  “I think the most important question facing… Read more

Video: Understanding the Inner Map

I presented to Katie Hendricks’ Leadership and Transformation program on 12/3/16. Here’s the YouTube link. Enjoy the theory behind the Inner Map, including: how to generate (vs drain) your energy how to use your stories to anchor yourself to an expanded state what Real Power looks like Narrow vs. Open Focus How to maximize living from Creative Brain (To support this presentation, download the Inner Map, and Functions of the Inner Map.)   Read more

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