The Fleshy Lusts Which War Against The Faithful Soul

The Fleshy Lusts Which War Against The Faithful Soul November 6, 2018

I had the pleasure, pardon the pun, of coming (sorry!) across this prolific pile of deuce a while ago. It gave me a good case of the snickers, and I thought I would run through some commentary on it with you all, so we can point and laugh together. Call it a bonding exercise. I love you jerks.

The title of the article is “Every Guy’s Struggle”. You might think that it’s going to be an article about colonoscopies or something that truly applies to every man, but no, it’s just another way for the author to talk about waxing his pole. You know Godless Mom ain’t turning away, now.

According to hairy palms, he discovered porn in high school, when he accidentally turned to a “secret” channel that his family “did not” subscribe to but which came through, albeit fuzzily, anyway.

GM note: I think this is nonsense. Maybe it’s time this fella had a chat with his self-loving Daddy. I mean bio-dad, not magic-dad. I bet his house went through a lot of Kleenex. I bet Daddy had a TV in the basement. Mmmhmm.

Our little downstairs DJ says he would go back to the “secret channel” throughout the year and “adjust his set” if you know what I’m saying. This would inevitably be followed by intense guilt. Why? Because magical, enchanting goddamned god.

Here’s the thing about guilt. Guilt is a fine thing to have if you’ve hurt someone or caused damage to someone’s property or something that just generally messes with another person. It’s also perfectly fine to feel guilty about something you may have done to yourself too, within reason. But guilt, my friends, is a powerful tool of manipulation if someone else can make you feel it when it’s completely unnecessary. They control you.

Sir spanks-a-lot says that he spent every post-bob-diddling sesh, like this:

I agonized. I pleaded with God:

“God, forgive me!”

“Help me!”

“I’m so sorry … “

This is the point where Godless Mom stops chuckling for a moment and gets pissed right off. This is absolute child abuse. I flipping dare you to disagree with me.

“Here you go kid, here’s a magic stick that, when you touch it, will make you feel pleasure beyond anything you’ve ever experienced in your life before. It kinda pissed it’s way through your childhood, popping up here and there but that was about it. Now that you’re a teen, I’m going to add powerful feeling to it, and hormonal urges that are going to be impossible to ignore and that no fully-functioning man has ever resisted. But I want you to ignore them anyway, use it only for peeing. I know you’re just a teenager, but if you touch it, you will burn. You will disappoint the man who created 93 billion lightyears worth of crap, my idiot son and the fart spirit we share. Good luck.”

That’s like putting a pile of brand new toys in a 6-year-old’s room and saying, “if you touch them, we’ll beat your puppy”.

The solution to all of this guilt, happy hands says, is to pray to be more like Joseph who was able to withstand the advances of a woman demanding sex. Let’s face it though, thinkers, ham jammer is just using this as an excuse to imagine himself being begged by some woman for sex. Lest we forget, also, that Joseph was stuck in a loveless marriage with a woman who liked to bang ghosts.

Predictably, he said it didn’t help. Absolute shocker.

In Bible group, other boys would let on that they had their own struggles. Of course, Godless Mom pictures a man literally struggling with his own giant, dominating, be-veined bazooka because I think in comics, but I digress. Of freaking course they struggle with how much to harass their own milkman. Even atheist men weigh the pros and cons of another tug vs. keeping their job or being late for a date or missing dinner with the parents. This is the state of being a dink-owner. It is the world’s best toy, and it’s there with you every second of every day. Resistance is an exercise in absolute futility.

Nevermind that, however, because tool time decided to start a squirt squad with his other biblically guilty meat beaters at church. That is to say, when their natural human urges inevitably became far too powerful to avoid any longer, and the bishop was predictably beaten, they would gather team-touch-a-lot and synchronize swords.

Another thing atheist men do a lot: talk about their dip sticks. Only atheists do it honestly and not under the guise of a supernatural support group.

You’re still being normal, there Han Solo. Totally, the eff, normal.

The solution finally came when an adult sat down with the pickle posse. I’m assuming after he had them compare wands, he told them the answer is to “run towards god”. I imagine they are still running. One of my favourite quotes from Forrest Gump has always been,

“That boy sho’ is a runnin’ foo’!”

We all know he’s not gonna find crap, and somewhere in a valley in Montana he’s gonna stop, turn to his followers and say, “I’m tired… I think I’ll go home now” and we’ll have another atheist in our midst.

Before he set out on his epic run though, sack slapper let us know two things. 1. He has not gained total control over his lustful feelings yet and 2. If us ladies could just not have tits, that’d help a great deal.

Well, eff you log flogger. Eff you and the baloney pony you rode in on.

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Kevin K

    So, the bit about the fuzzy porn channel could be true. Back in the very, very early days of cable TV, there were channels that were kinda-sorta fuzzed out, but you could make out what they were saying and in back of the snow-covered screen, you could make out the “action” (such as it was). The description would date the writer to being somewhere in his mid-50s to 60s.

    But I’m absolutely screaming about the rest of it. Laughing my ass off. Ded.

    Brilliant. Just. Brilliant.

  • Polytropos

    Except in the article this owner-operator claims to be a college freshman. I couldn’t find a date on the article but this guy can’t be old enough to have enjoyed the fuzzy delights of very early cable TV. The cable channel part at least must be a lie; maybe he’d heard about those early cable channels and thought accidentally stumbling across a forbidden channel sounded less bad than deliberately accessing PornHub.

  • zenlike

    “Every Guy’s Struggle”

    This is already patently false. This is only a struggle for the sexually repressed ones. This is not a struggle for people with a healthy outlook on sex and sexuality. Once again, they cannot imagine anyone thinking or behaving differently from them.

  • Kevin K

    Yeah, if that’s a recent recollection — well — it’s a lie.

    Also, I know about the “fuzzy porn” channels only because I heard about it from a … friend … I would never try to stroke the salami to an unauthorized cable TV channel. Honest!

  • chemical

    …somewhere in a valley in Montana he’s gonna stop, turn to his followers and say, “I’m tired… I think I’ll go home now”

    Given that this post is about masturbation, I just wanted to post this line out of context.

  • Polytropos

    Naturally! None of us here would ever do that. Not now we have the internet, anyway.

  • Fred Tully

    Barbed wire, used properly, can be a beautiful sight.

  • Milo C

    I’d like to add that individuals have different levels of sex drive also. I think it is one of many things each person has on a sliding scale, like aggressiveness or how much mayonnaise belongs on one sandwich. Asking me to abstain from mayonnaise would not be a big deal; my spouse however…

  • igotbanned999

    Actually I saw a channel like that in the 90s.

  • I grew up with this mindset. There were times when folks from church called to see how I was doing on not giving Curious George a woodshed experience, and I was even urged to fast to avoid it. I was told that firing the surgeon general was lust, as it involved lustful fantasies. (One televangelist, Rod Parsley, had a fit because most Americans see nothing wrong with sexual fantasies.) I was even told, in a prophetic word (when a speaker claims his or her words are from God himself), to “conquer lust” before I got married.

    I was told that self-pleasure could lead to homosexuality (hmm, homophobia) and even that “lust” could lead to rape. (Fundies say this, but conservatives bash liberals and feminists for allegedly saying all men are rapists!!?? It seems it is the fundies saying that, and fundies aren’t liberal feminists!) It kinda freaks me out that an elder thinks that. (I do consider there could be a racial jab there, due to stereotypes about MOC. Even if it is about race, it still makes me wonder why this dude thought of that particular racist stereotype. Should he be watched?)

    Also, OP goes on about breasts. Well, that assumes all dudes like breasts, which is false. Some dudes aren’t even interested in women; for others, many like feet, shoes, or boots, which would be exposed even with the full burkhas worn in some Islamist countries. (I have heard some fundy men claim that “avoiding lust” is probably easier for fetishists who don’t like breasts, since they don’t have to worry about breasts everywhere. But…they still have to deal with the stereotype that men like breasts.)

  • Oh yeah, well into the 90s. For the most part they were pay-per-view channels, and sometimes you could make them out pretty well. Every now and then they come in crystal clear for a while. I never understood it, but I damn sure enjoyed it back when I was about 14 or 15. By 16 I had the Internet and never needed another source for porn.

  • I consider guilt to be absolutely insidious genius-level behavior on the part of religion. Get people to feel guilty for things that they cannot change, such as simply having a sex drive, and gain absolute power over them.

  • Raging Bee

    “Whipping the baloney-pony” — could that be another euphemism for Christurbation?

  • TheBookOfDavid

    It should be. If you can’t Balaam, join ’em.

  • Illithid

    Second the confirmation on fuzzy cable/sattelite porn channels. It certainly isn’t something I’d expect recently, but I remember being inspired by such at a friend’s house in the late 80s. Thank Kinsey we both had flexible standards, because the girls wanted football players with cars.

    I’ve definitely had to criticize my son about his solo activities. I said, “you’ve got a room with a door; quit using up all the damn hot water!”

  • Geoff Plumridge

    This is truly horrible. Does the author really believe that there is no-one out there that doesn’t engage in sexual deviancy and engages in sexual intercourse within the sacrament of marriage purely for procreation? It is a sticky dark bleak world this author believes in then. I feel pity.

  • Cozmo the Magician

    So, is this guy blaming bad cable for his lack of adult sexuality? Or is he just making up more incel bullshit. I’m going with the later.

    FFS, if he is bitching that cable made him jerk off, what a sorry twit. OTOH, if he is saying that somehow poorly shown porn on a tv LMFAO. On the gripping hand, this guy sounds so full of shit I sorry you wasted your time reading his shit.

    BUT, please keep up the fun with words (;

  • Cozmo the Magician

    Btw, I NEVER struggled with jerking off. If you have problems with that, seek some medical help.

  • Illithid

    “Gripping hand”. Heh.

    PS. Yes, I’ve read the Motie books.

  • wolfypuppy

    Right. So, instead of raping someone, nice little religious boy, use your hands. Oh. Wait. The Bible says rape’s all good, but using your own hands will send you to Hell? There we go. Rape Culture.

  • wolfypuppy

    LOL! My 13 year old takes half hour showers and gets out with his hair still greasy. I don’t think he’s using shampoo in there.

  • wolfypuppy

    I haven’t read much of the Bible at all. Each time I glance at yet, usually to research some allusion, I get appalled. So, somewhere in the Bible some guy named Joseph gets sexually harassed by an aggressive woman. Could this be why all these Christian moms are “more worried for their sons than their daughters” during this unfair #metoo moment? Ack. Religion just turns out to be worse and worse. The problem in the U.S. is that we have the worst of it–the traditions of the crazy Puritans and their Rapture theology. I can’t STAND IT! BTW, I’m 51, was brought up in a conservative religious tradition, and yes, I still have sex issues. I still have to tell myself “it’s okay to enjoy this! Women can enjoy this too!” Pathetic, huh.

  • Brian Curtis

    “Deviancy,” LOL. If you’ve got consenting adults, nothing is deviant.

  • Brian Curtis

    It’s only a struggle if your arm’s in a cast.

  • LOL

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Anything sexual that isn’t for the purpose of procreating new human life is by definition a clear deviancy, and a general abomination in the eyes of the creator.

  • Jim Jones

    All life has two imperatives it must follow.

    1) Survive.

    2) Reproduce.

    It’s interesting that religion denies and opposes these – life, because it calls on you to sacrifice yours but only in approved ways and with a promise of eternal life.

    Reproduction: in every way except the one that is ‘approved’ by sky fairies. They say.

  • Jim Jones

    There’s always the picnic table.

  • Jim Jones

    Bettie Page was very popular – when that was illegal.

  • Brian Curtis

    Then let him speak up and do something about it. Meanwhile, your silly superstitions have no power over the rest of us.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Of course not. Dunno about the author though, seems as if her whole being drips with depravity.

  • Brian Curtis

    “Depravity,” LOL again. You are a font of amusing delusions. As if you have the right to judge the behavior and relationships of others, and as if anyone should care about your approval. Only small-minded failures try to play morality police.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    I have as much right as anybody to express my beliefs, just as you have the right to belittle them. I believe that sexual activity outside a sanctified marriage bed is both immoral as well as psychologically damaging to those engaged in the immoral activities.

  • Some guy

    It was the ’80s for me. Those snowy, grainy, colorless, “in-between” channels where you could barely make out (heh heh) any detail. Like watching two people doing it in a blizzard. Oh, that used to piss me off! (Didn’t slow me down for a second, but it still pissed me off.)

  • Some guy

    “Beveined bazooka”? Once again, Godless Mom rules the side-splitting euphemism! (I’d offer some kind of salute, but the pictures that come to mind are downright unpleasant.)

  • Some guy

    No, that would be “racking the heretic”.

  • Some guy

    Right. If only this presumably healthy adolescent male hadn’t run across that devil porn (such as it was) on cable, it never would have occurred to him that he had a laser pointer (if you’ll pardon the technological anachronism).

  • Some guy

    Ouch!

  • Some guy

    What psychological damage, precisely?

  • Some guy

    I once knew a straight guy who had an actual phobia of big breasts; he was genuinely afraid of being smothered by them. Personally, I can think of a lot worse ways to go.

  • Geoff Plumridge
  • Some guy

    That article mainly discusses PHYSICAL risks (STDs, etc.) which, while obviously real, can still be minimized with intelligent condom use. Other secondary physical risks, such as substance abuse, may correlate with unsafe sex practices, but aren’t necessarily CAUSED BY “promiscuity”. Domestic violence, in particular, can happen in long-term relationships as well — hell, how many relationships remain “long-term” only because the victims are afraid to leave? Finally, while a healthy, long-term relationship carries psychological benefits (I’m a case in point), this doesn’t translate to a non-long-term relationship model being psychologically harmful.

    Thanks for your reply, but I don’t see an argument here for PSYCHOLOGICAL damage.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Cool

  • Cozmo the Magician

    My pointer used to be laser powered. Now i’m lucky enough to get a spark out of it O_o

  • Some guy

    Aww, did you used to play with a magnifying glass on sunny days, too?

  • Cozmo the Magician

    No, I did not kill ants

  • Some guy

    You were a better kid than I was.

  • Cozmo the Magician

    You actually BELIEVED me? Damn, I’m a better magician then even I thought. O_o

  • MissAgatha

    Heh when I was 16 or so I had a huuuge crush on this guy at my church … right up until the day he got up in front of the church during “testimony time” and announced that god had cured him of his desire to spend quality time with his mom’s VS catalog. Umm ew??!

  • Raging Bee

    What do you expect this guy to do — make his porn-discovery story sound more plausible than their conversion-from-atheism stories? That could cause major problems!

  • Polytropos

    True! They have to stick to the theme.

  • Raging Bee

    “Folks from church” called to question you over the phone about your wanking habits? That’s creepy enough, even without thinking of how the “folks” decided who would make the call to which members…

    Seriously, this sounds like a really weird idea for a really silly porn movie…something about well-meaning church busybodies lecturing fellow parishioners about masturbation and sex fantasies over the phone, and causing exactly the opposite effect of what they’d thought they were supposed to accomplish…I guess “Busybodies” would make a good working title…maybe it could get filed in both the “Spiritual” and “Erotica” categories…

  • I’m postmenopausal and not going to be procreating any new life. I’m not going to become celibate and sexless to spare your imaginary friend’s fee-fees.

    Sic ‘im, BOB!

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Good for you. I don’t give a damn what you do. Just don’t imagine that there aren’t people out there that have actually waited until they are married to have sexual intercourse, and would remain celibate if they were not procreating. There are far more of us than you think.

  • If that’s what people want to do I have no problem with that. I do object to your implication that our choices are “deviant.” That’s just plain rude.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Truth is subjective. In my world-view anyone that engages in sexual activity outside a direct use for procreation is a literal abomination. I can completely understand the alternate view that any and all sexual activity is completely natural and should be explored. Believe me it is much harder to avoid temptation than to actively embrace it. But you should be true to yourself, if you believe what you are doing is fine then no-one on this earth should judge you..

  • How do you walk down a city street without collapsing into a quivering puddle of pure terror, surrounded as you are by “literal abominations” on all sides?

    And how do you reconcile “anyone that engages in sexual activity outside a direct use for procreation is a literal abomination” with “I don’t give a damn what you do”?

  • Geoff Plumridge

    If I don’t give a damn what you do how am I judging you? My faith teaches me that most of humanity is already damned.

    “Enter through the narrow gate because the gate and road that lead to destruction are wide. Many enter through the wide gate”.

    I’m not your judge, I’m just trying to go through the narrow gate. Forgive me if I don’t really care what road you are on.

  • And [do] you think you deserve a ticket through this alleged “narrow gate” with your “Screw you unrepentant sinners, I’ve got mine” attitude?

    Geoff, I made a vow over ten years ago to go to Hell on purpose if such a place actually exists (although I doubt very much that it does). The idea of spending eternity in paradise while billions of people are suffering is more horrifying to me than the thought of being in hell.

    (Edited to better express my intention with the question I asked)

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Now who is being judgemental? Life is difficult enough without worrying whether some random postmenopausal (& potentially Asatru) atheist is upset with the tenets of my religion. I don’t care if you are right or wrong, I am only being true to myself and my beliefs. And if there is a Hell, then I sincerely hope I don’t meet you there. But then again, that isn’t up to me, all I can do is try and follow the narrow path as best as I can.

  • I didn’t judge you, Geoff — I asked you to judge yourself, to see if your attitude makes sense in the context of your beliefs. If your beliefs are intended to make you into a better, more compassionate person, the “I don’t care” part is really an outlier.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    But that is exactly the thing, I am (I hope) a caring & compassionate person, and most people that know me would (hopefully) describe me as such. But I am simply not going to listen to any virtue signalling from atheists about my faith. I know it is hard to understand, but people with faith REALLY care about that faith. It is a defining part of that person, and an integral part of how they view the world. I truly believe in a creator and I absolutely 100% wish with all my heart that everyone has a place at his table, but my faith (and my heart) tells me otherwise. If you are a devout atheist then that is fine, I don’t judge you in any way, shape or form. But don’t mock or belittle my belief system out of some misplaced sense of superiority. My job is to go for the narrow gate, if you believe that there is no road there at all then that isn’t my problem, you have come to that conclusion on your own, you have free will. If you are really just searching and want to find the road again, then just randomly pick up the good book and flick open a page, I guarantee you that something on that random page will speak to you and you alone. You can work out on your own what you want to do from there. Sermon over.

  • If you aren’t going to accept criticisms of your faith, stop judging our sexuality. It’s a part of us, too.

    And do you think I haven’t read the Bible? I read it nearly 55 years ago. The only part that resonates with me is Matthew 25:35-40, and although I totally lack religious belief I try to follow “feed the hungry, clothe the naked.”

  • Geoff Plumridge

    I don’t judge your sexuality. Don’t judge my faith:

    “The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life, is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring; this covenant between baptised persons has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament.”

    I didn’t say read the bible, I said pick it up and open a random page.

    Matthew 25? Key passages. I love Galatians 6:14

    “But God forbid that I should glory, save in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom the world is crucified unto me, and I unto the world.”

  • Romulan Sleet, Snow and Hail

    I will judge your faith whenever I want to. Go eat shit, christian.

  • Romulan Sleet, Snow and Hail

    There is no creator.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Thanks for clearly demonstrating how hate filled and judgemental atheists can be. Fanatical bigoted fuckwits.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Yes dear.

  • Romulan Sleet, Snow and Hail

    There is no creator.

  • Romulan Sleet, Snow and Hail

    Go eat shit, christian.

  • Romulan Sleet, Snow and Hail

    There are no such people. You are lying.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Yes dear.

  • I shall not be silenced. You called us depraved, and if you don’t like being called deluded, GTFO.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Depraved, deprived, debauched, deluded, dissolute, degenerate, decadent, disreputable, devious, desperate, distasteful, disagreeable, discourteous, detestable, disobliging, deplorable. So many good d words in English for the average garden variety lefty atheist.

  • Better a “lefty atheist” than you, Geoff.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    There isn’t anyone lower in humanity than a lefty atheist.

  • Ah. So you have an insurmountable problem with people who are okay with helping out the disadvantaged people in a society, and who are unconvinced with respect to the existence of gods. Got it.

  • Delightfully disdainful of dumb-ass deity-devotees, too.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    No I have an insurmountable problem with virtue signalling hypocritical lefty atheists. They are the scum on the bottom of the shoe of humanity.

  • *pats Geoff on the head* There, there…

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Decidedly disparaging of you.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Thanks. I needed it.

  • Oh, I knew *that* already.

  • Raging Bee

    Hey, if his God got him to look at REAL women with REAL bodies instead of the VS catalog, I’d consider that a step forward!

  • Raging Bee

    I find it’s more enjoyable if you make it MORE of a struggle and get your back into it. Or so I’m told…

  • Raging Bee

    So what? None of that means the rest of us are wrong or evil.

  • Raging Bee

    But I am simply not going to listen to any virtue signalling from atheists about my faith.

    So why should we listen to any virtue signaling from Christians about anything?

    I truly believe in a creator and I absolutely 100% wish with all my heart that everyone has a place at his table, but my faith (and my heart) tells me otherwise.

    Right…you really really REALLY want to believe your God will have room for everyone — because you know that’s really how a wise and loving God would treat his creation — but your “faith” tells you otherwise and that gives you an excuse to pretend God hates the same people you do. Cool story, bro…

  • Raging Bee

    Wow, it only took you ONE DAY to crumble from “I don’t judge your sexuality” to a tantrum full of derogatory words toward people you were trying SOOO HARD to pretend not to judge. What a jucking foke.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    I don’t hate anyone brah that is what atheists do. They hate better than any other group of humans. I only feel sorry for you.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Pfft. Sounds like a guilty conscience to me.

  • Raging Bee

    You’re the ones making up stories about an afterlife of eternal torment for everyone you don’t like, but we’re the haters? Are you even grown-up enough to be called a hypocrite?

  • Raging Bee

    Pfft. Sounds like empty bigotry to me.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    So sure aren’t you? Good luck with that. So sincerely sorry for you if you find out you are wrong. Good luck and God bless.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Yes dear.

  • Raging Bee

    Same back to you: are you sure you’re worshipping the right god? You Christians have been fighting over which is the “right” interpretation of your Bible literally since day one, and the stakes are pretty high…are you sure you’re on the right side here?

  • Geoff Plumridge

    I’d pick an actual message over a book of nothing any day.

  • Raging Bee

    So would I. That’s why I don’t waste my time with your Bible.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Cool. That is why I don’t waste my time with your nothing.

  • Raging Bee

    Then why did “the creator” knowingly create us with so much ability to enjoy all those non-procreative activities?

  • Raging Bee

    Truth is subjective.

    Careful with the grade-school subjectivism there — you must undermined the foundation of your own beliefs, among other things.

    In my world-view anyone that engages in sexual
    activity outside a direct use for procreation is a literal abomination.

    Your world-view is bullshit, and of absolutely no use to anyone else.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    May as well ask why he engineered us to enjoy fat sugar and carbs. Moderation is the key whether you are a deluded theist or a virtue signalling atheist.

  • Jason Waters

    Crusades, Dark Ages, literal witch hunts with deadly results.. Condemning people to burn for eternity… Yeah, no hate with religion. Kill kids for mocking a man, flood the earth because even though you’re a perfect creator, you somehow fucked everything up and had to start over. Selling your daughter to her rapist because she’s no longer pure. Remind me again of all the atrocities caused by people who don’t believe… I’ll wait… It’ll be a long wait, I’m sure.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    In your opinion brah. If the majority of the western world want to engage in the quick buck and the quick fuck then we aren’t responsible for the degradation in values, just down to that old story when Eve decided to exercise her free will. Mate seriously do whatever the hell you want I don’t care.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Estimated 20th century dead caused by atheist socialist regimes between 60-150 million people. You make Christianity look like a musket to an atomic bomb.

  • Raging Bee

    Aaaand, now you’re down to incoherent raving. I guess it’s past your bedtime.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    Yes dear.

  • Raging Bee

    Well, your belief doesn’t flatly prohibit fat, sugar or carbs; so maybe you have no good reason to prohibit non-procreative sex either.

  • At least it isn’t “Socks are for feet only; use a Kleenex, please!”

  • Found the incel.

  • Geoff Plumridge

    You people are fanatically into self projection aren’t you. Can’t imagine that anyone couldn’t be as sexually perverse as you lot personally are. My pity levels increase daily.

  • Dragonia

    Oh my god, this was pretty funny… I have so many new euphemisms to verbally play with!