How would Noah have gotten North American buffalo to his Ark?

How would Noah have gotten North American buffalo to his Ark? February 23, 2020

Here’s another amusing cartoon based on the endless improbabilities and silly assumptions in the Bible’s beloved story of Noah’s Ark.

humor cartoon noah ark god science

Forget for a moment the impossible logistics required to populate the ark, to gather for that purpose a male-female pair of every animal species in existence in Noah’s day. For example, how to get buffalo to the ark from their native habitat in what would one day be North America? Or seals from the Arctic Circle? It’s not like he had FedEx or airplanes, or even knew where those places were.

There were also other practical considerations Noah would have had to contend with, such as calculating — and storing on the ark — enough food, not to mention heavy, voluminous potable water, for all the animals and Noah’s family members during the 40 days and 40 nights of cataclysmic flooding throughout the world that God told Noah would soon occur.

And, of course, there’s the probably more worrisome problem of finding food for everyone after the flood, when all land, including cropland, would remain underwater for a long, indeterminate period when harvests would be impossible.

This cartoon pokes fun at such practicalities for which the Bible’s telling of the tale indicates neither God nor Noah properly anticipated. For example, Fido can’t be rushed. Of course, Noah could have allowed him to do his business inside the ark, but if all the animals (thousands upon thousands of them) did that — as they eventually must have done once the boat was underway — it would be a mess.

Another source of doubt is the size and dimensions of the craft as specified in the Bible — 300 x 50 x 30 cubits, for length, width and height, respectively. That would be a very top-heavy boat: long, tall and narrow (about 1,175 feet long, 196 feet wide and 118’ high using the longest version of cubic utilized by the Romans), making it wildly prone, I’d guess, to just flopping over.

For the uninitiated, the common cubit, which is somewhat shorter than the Romans’, is based on the forearm length from the tip of the middle finger to the bottom of the elbow and divided as 6 palms x 4 fingers = 24 digits (whatever that means). However, that begs the question of how accurate such a unit is considering people roughly range in size from Goliath (or larger) and Woody Allen (or shorter).

In fact, the Bible’s description of the ark and its logistical issues is scant in the extreme.

Nonetheless, the whole scenario appears enormously dubious because there is zero geological or fossil evidence that a great worldwide flood of biblical proportions ever happened, and despite a lot of hunting, no credible evidence of an actual ark has been uncovered, either.

Still, it’s a great, even epic, story that seems to appeal greatly to human beings, especially Christians, although Islam’s holy book, the Quran, also touches on the flood and ark.

But, captivating as the tale may be it remains extravagantly improbable, akin to myth, and most likely apocryphal, meaning completely made-up.

Image/Pinterest/Based on Nonsequiter cartoon

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