Last month I had the opportunity to meet with and address a wonderful group of women, Faithful Moms. When I received the invitation to talk to them, I knew the talk needed to be about motherhood. Spending time with them, offering God’s love and witnessing the love that they had for God and each other was an amazing experience. It reminded me of the beauty of motherhood and the amazing influence that women have in this world. To celebrate Mother’s Day with grace, let’s honor the beauty and complexity of motherhood while reflecting God’s nurturing love for humankind.
The Beauty and Complexity of Mother’s Day
Mother’s Day in the United States is celebrated annually on the second Sunday in May. According to History.com, “The American incarnation of Mother’s Day was created by Anna Jarvis in 1908 and became an official U.S. holiday in 1914.” This holiday has a rich history of how it came to be and then the fight to de-commercialize it while acknowledging the value of all women. The beauty lies in the celebration of all women and all of their accomplishments.
Mother’s Day is complex because motherhood is complex. Motherhood involves a mix of feelings such as joy, gratitude and grief or longing. It is a tough job, but can be very rewarding. Motherhood is a role, but it is also a calling. Motherhood can also take on non-traditional roles, but lies in the heart of the woman.
A Mother’s Heart
There are all kinds of mothers in this world. When you picture what a mother is, generally an image of a woman who is nurturing, a protector and someone who offers guidance comes to mind. Thinking about motherhood often stirs feelings and images of unconditional love. Even the Bible references a comparison to mothers in Isaiah 66:13, “As a mother comforts her child, so I will comfort you; in Jerusalem you shall find your comfort.” (usccb.org)
The heart of a mother contains commitment to the love, protection and growth of her children. It is a commitment like no other that creates a strong bond to be cherished always. But let’s keep in mind that mothers are human and humans are flawed. We often expect our mothers to be perfect and are disappointed when they are not. It is in their heart that the beauty lies.
When Motherhood Feels Imperfect
Whether you are a mother or a child, it is important to let go of unrealistic standards. The world often tells us that as mothers we need to be perfect and do it all. The world tells us as children that if something is wrong with us, there is a good chance that your mother caused it. I know I have fallen for that. It is easy for me to see where my own mother went wrong, but I have to remind myself that she did the best that she could. I will never know fully the things she dealt with while raising five kids. Then I reflect on my own motherhood. It is easy to see my own flaws; where I feel I have failed my own children. Now that my kids have spouses and some have their own kids, it is very easy for me to see where “I messed up” or where “I could have been a better mom.” With my lived experience, it is easy for me to see what I could have done and what I should have done.
It’s times like these that grace over perfection is needed. Give grace to your mother for what she may not have handled perfectly just as you must give yourself grace for your imperfections. What matters most is the love and bond shared between mothers and their children. Look for the good. See God’s grace in everything. Share the wisdom that you have gained so that future mothers grow beautifully.
Expanding the Definition of “Mother”
The definition of mother is plainly, “ a female parent.” But if you look around in this world, in your community, among extended daily and even in our circle of friends, you can witness that motherhood can be more, mean more.along with the traditional definition of motherhood are many more variations. Naturally there is the step-mom. This is a woman that becomes mom by marriage. Although she usually has some limitations in some parenting roles, her heart is that of a mother.
Expanding the definition even more shows us that the heart of a mother lives in many roles. There are spiritual mothers, Godmothers, mentors, caregivers and even friends who may have the hearts of mothers. If you are a woman, examine your own relationships. How do you interact with others? Personally, I know that I become motherly to people who I feel need extra love, kindness and direction, regardless of our relationship.
Mary, Mother of God: Our Holy Example
Talking about the definition of motherhood leads you to examine motherly role models. God gave us a good one, Mary, Mother of God. First, Mary said yes to God. Luke 1:38 explains this clearly, “Mary said, ‘Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word.” Then the angel departed from her.’” (usccb.org) This was her commitment to motherhood (and to God). Although she was not aware of all to come, she knew she would be a mother. Mary provided examples of how a mother should be. Some of these were:
Trust and Surrender in God: From her “yes” Mary demonstrated her trust in God’s purpose for her life. She surrendered to God’s Will despite what backlash she thought she may receive from society.
Sacrifice and Unconditional Love: Mary stayed with Jesus from the beginning of His life to the end of His life.along with joys, she witnessed great pain and sorrow. She was there every step to nurture, support and love.
Protection: Mary saw to it that the needs of Jesus were met. From swaddling and feeding Him as an infant to nurturing and serving Him in every season of His life.
Spiritual Example: From the beginning, Mary demonstrated great faith and service to God.
As mothers, Mary provides a role model to emulate. Mothers are called to be the same for their children as Mary was for Jesus. Trials and successes may be different. The journey may be different, but all mothers are servants to God to raise their children the best that they can to be disciples. Society makes this very difficult. Lean into the gifts and strengths God has given you and remember to pray, just as Mary did.
Encouragement for Mothers
It is true that a mother’s work is never done. Once a mother, always a mother. Although you will witness heartache, pain, difficult times and disappointment, the blessings outweigh these difficult experiences. Remember that you are seen in your care, love and sacrifice for your children. Your spiritual guidance and example will reach many people through your children and their children. Although your children do not define you, they are your handiwork, your contribution to make time on earth a glorious place.
Remember that the definition of mother can be broad and even though a woman may not have given birth to a child, she can still fill the role of mother and provide a mother’s love and care. Together, let’s pray for mothers and women filling the role of mothers everywhere:
Lord, bless every woman today.
Allow her to feel the love and gratitude that she so deserves for answering God’s call to be caring, nurturing and supportive. On this Mother’s Day, we honor mothers everywhere. We know that being a mother will appear differently for different people. We are grateful for the mother’s sacrifice, love, faith and surrender to You in fulfilling their role to lift up humanity. Bless them abundantly and allow them to feel love and gratitude on this special day and every day.
In Jesus’ name we pray.
Amen.
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