President Trump To Give Supporters Russian Brides

President Trump To Give Supporters Russian Brides March 11, 2019

 

Washington DC – President Trump and the GOP are facing a threat to future success. The threat is there are more and more brown and black skinned people in the American electorate and comparatively fewer whites. Trump’s solution?

Mail-order Russian brides.

Republican Problems

Pew Research reported on the changing demographics of US voters:

Taken together, this strong growth among minority populations means that a third of eligible voters will be nonwhite in 2020, up from about a quarter in 2000. This increase is at least partially linked to immigration and naturalization patterns: One-in-ten eligible voters in the 2020 election will have been born outside the U.S., the highest share since at least 1970.

And that does not bode well for Trumpists:

Still, the changing racial and ethnic composition of the electorate likely has political implications in part because nonwhites have long been significantly more likely than whites to back Democratic candidates. For instance, in the 2016 election, white voters favored Donald Trump by a 15 percentage point margin, while large majorities of blacks and Hispanics voted for Hillary Clinton.

The Solution

“America needs to be American,” the President told reporters. “We’re going to preserve the country of our forefathers with white babies. White babies from Russian blushing brides.”

White House insiders say the commander-in-chief is preparing the Russian Baby Makers (RBM) executive order. RBM will create tax incentives for uneducated white males to get as many as 5 Russian mail-order brides for free.

And, yes, another aspect of RBM is to allow polygamy in special cases. The special cases are baby making. Those men utilizing the new program must procreate within 1 year of receiving their bride(s).

Reactions

Reverend Andrew Canard leads the Associated Southern Baptist Assemblies (ASBA). And he’s quite excited with Trump’s bold move. “Every red-blooded American male knows American women aren’t submissive enough,” he explained. “Foreign white women are the answer to our prayers.”

Political pundits expect the GOP’s polygamous Russian mail-order bride scheme will ensure victory in 2020.

“Hoover won by promising a chicken in every pot and a car in every garage,” one anonymous political expert noted. “Trump is going to win with promising white men five women in every bed.”

 


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