Tens of thousands of Area 51 truthers charged the military base in the early hours this Friday morning. Their mission was to uncover the truth about aliens. First started as an Internet prank, the charge to reveal the government coverup became a movement. And that movement met its logical conclusion in the desert sands of Nevada.
“We decided to let them in,” reported Area 51 Commander Andrew Canard. “Of course, that forced many of them to leave. They were hoping for glory. What they got were lines like you find at Disney World.”
Some truthers state they had to wait in line for five hours to take the walking tour. Many complained there wasn’t enough nachos to go around. A few unruly truth seekers tried to cut the line and get in the front saying their moms wanted them back by dinner. However, order was maintained.
Who did they find?
“It makes sense. How can one person create PayPal, Tesla, and SpaceX?” noted one anonymous truth seeker. “That dude has to be an alien.”
Due to the fact there were so many visitors, Elon Musk could spend only a few minutes with each tour group. He soon discovered most people weren’t interested in the nitty-gritty of his newest research regarding the Alcubierre warp drive. Instead, questions focused on his native planet.“I had to say ‘I’m not from Krypton’ so many times I gave up,” Musk admitted. “By the time the day was over, I just went with it.”
Visitors didn’t want to hear Mr. Musk had a lab at Area 51, where he helped the government do basic research. Surprisingly, it turns out people just want to hear fantastic fairy tales than listen to the truth.
And what about comedian Joe Rogan smoking pot in the corner of Musk’s lab? He had a fun time watching the show.