UPDATE: The 2nd Amendment Is In Hiding

UPDATE: The 2nd Amendment Is In Hiding September 13, 2019

If NRA members give up their guns, they will get an honorary GED.

The 2nd Amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America is in hiding. The amendment for a well-regulated militia hasn’t been seen for days. Friends and family are concerned and hope the amendment responsible for mass shootings, suicides, and accidentally getting shot in the testicles comes home soon.

Anonymous sources report the 2nd Amendment got more and more anxious as the third Democratic presidential debate drew closer.

”He saw the writing on the wall,” said one friend. “Once Beto O’Rourke said he was coming for AR-15s and AK-47s, he knew it was only a matter of time before Democrats float the idea of passing an amendment to kill him.”

Many pundits say repealing the 2nd Amendment is an absurd idea. However, Americans of a certain age remember when gay marriage, a Black president, and marijuana legalization seemed like pipe dreams, too.

Professor Allan Lichtman teaches at American University. He has successfully predicted presidential elections since 1984. He’s all in for repealing the 2nd Amendment. He pointed out on the Naked Diner Podcast many people thought undoing Prohibition was impossible. And yet a constitutional amendment passed repealing it.

Professor Lichtman also pointed out the NRA is under siege financially. Without the NRA to protect it, the 2nd Amendment may crumble quickly.

”It turns out Democrats just need to lead,” snarked Naked Diner cohost Andrew Hall. “We could be witnessing the beginning of the end for out of control gun ownership in the United States.”

While no one knows for sure where the 2nd Amendment is hiding, there is evidence it could be in Russia or Russia or Russia.

Evangelicals are banding together. They are creating teams of prayer warriors to send all of their thoughts and prayers to Jesus’ favorite piece of legislation.

Will thoughts and prayers work?

Probably not.

 

 


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