Barron Trump Grounded For Watching CNN

Barron Trump Grounded For Watching CNN November 22, 2020


Washington DC – The youngest of the Trump children, 15-year-old Barron, is in hot water. Sources in the White House say he is grounded for an unspecified amount of time. And what was his crime? Watching Dr. Sanjay Gupta talk about the coronavirus pandemic on CNN.

Barron Trump Sneaks CNN Into The White House

Passions are running high in the Trump administration. It looks like Donald Trump is going to be remembered for botching the COVID-19 response as well as a variety of criminal enterprises and other reprehensible behavior. Throughout the 2016 campaign until today the 45th President of the United States claimed cable news station CNN “fake news.” Catching Barron watching the station is tantamount to treason for clan Trump.

But who discovered the crime?

White House sources state Eric Trump was the one who ratted out his younger brother. Supposedly, Eric went to visit Barron. The older brother needed help in reading a really big world. However, instead of getting assistance, Eric opened Barron’s bedroom door without knocking and found the teen highly focused on what CNN medical correspondent Dr. Sanjay Gupta had to say about the third wave of the COVID-19 pandemic.

And that’s when all hell let loose.

The Punishment

Andrew Canard is a senior aide to Barron. He assists the high schooler with homework, arranging his schedule, and navigating what many see as the difficult personalities that make up his immediate family. “Eric is a rat. He went right to daddy and told him Barron was watching CNN,” Canard quipped. “Not being the brightest bulb, Eric said the kid was “watching CNN words” and that those words “weren’t daddy’s words.”

Donald met with Melania and told her what the punishment was going to be. Barron needed to be grounded, and that means no free MAGA swag for a week. Oh, and he can’t leave his room for “who knows how long.”

Mr. Canard reports Barron is happy with the punishment. If nothing else, that means his chances of getting coronavirus for that time period will be very, very small.

In related news, Barron Trump’s college fund is missing.


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