Liz Cheney who serves as Wyoming’s only representative in the House of Representatives released 1,000 feral cats into former President Donald Trump’s Mar-a Lago resort early this morning. Reports from conservative news sources OAN and Mewsmax state the cats are roaming free throughout the grounds and the 110,000 square foot mansion. The frisky felines are enjoying the posh high life. Visitors seem to be enjoying their four-legged new friends. Many are giving them treats and the cats are loving it. One person who isn’t enjoying the visit is Donald J. Trump.
Why 1,000 Cats?
Representative Cheney acquired the cats from the Tree House Humane Society. Andrew Canard heads the group and is quick to point out that his kitties are living their best lives through the group’s Cats at Work program. “There are colonies of cats throughout Florida. We take cats who were sick and now can’t reintegrate into their original group and can’t adapt to being in a home. After giving them their shots and making sure they can’t reproduce, they are released to fight vermin like rats.”
Mr. Canard went on to say large cities like Chicago use the Tree House Humane Society to fight infestations. Representative Cheney reportedly told him she knew of a “huge problem” and need 1,000 of his best workers to fight off a rat colony.
Former President Trump Is Enraged At Cats
It’s common knowledge the 45th President of the United States is not an animal lover. Now that his club is home to 1,000 mousers who are hunting vermin, he hates cats even more. “Cats are the work of loser Liz Cheney and Nancy Pelosi. I don’t like any of them. Cats’ breath smells like Eric’s and I hate that.” What makes his hatred burn even hotter is that it will take weeks to rid himself of the creatures. He also believes the cats are plotting against him.
The consensus of cat psychologists say cats aren’t capable of large-scale tactical planning. The former President shouldn’t worry about the felines planning any operation to take down large prey. However, a significant minority of cat professionals believe the feral creatures may be in shock due to seeing such a large rat walking on two legs. “Animals adapt and sometimes mammal behavior can change quite dramatically when facing a new threat,” said one anonymous specialist. “I don’t want to be Donald Trump right now.”
Liz Cheney Is Not Ashamed
Representative Cheney just lost her position as Chair of the House Republican Conference due to her outspoken disgust with Trump’s many lies and his orchestration of the January 6th insurrection. She’s not ashamed of her statements stating the GOP can’t be pro-Trump and pro-democracy at the same time. And she’s not ashamed about dumping 1,000 feral cats at Mar-a-Lago. If she could do it all over again she would in a heartbeat.
In related news, cicadas attack televangelist Joel Osteen in his mansion.
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