Editors note: Please welcome Baptist Taliban to our Spiritual Abuse Survivor Blogs Network! She will be writing a new series for us.
In order to add some context to the articles I have written on this blog I want to designate a page to summarize our story from beginning to end.
It is my hope, as it has always been, to expose not only the wrongs that The Preacher was guilty of, but to own the actual wrongs we committed as opposed to what The Preacher has stated publicly using skilled innuendo and out-right public accusations.
Since it is obvious that sides have been chosen between our family and The Preacher’s, the resulting division and excommunication of family members to this day is due to much ignorance, misinformation, rumors and even blatant lies about us.
This is a fact that I can not tolerate without at least making our story available so that if any families were divided directly or indirectly on the basis of association to members of my family, the ones who chose to believe they were acting in obedience to scripture by disassociating themselves from their own family members for continuing to associate with us, can reconsider just how ‘scriptural‘ that decision and how true their information about us really was and is.
I also wish, however, to settle whatever assumptions may still exist….the parts of our story that was either assumed or fabricated concerning my family’s experience in the church and the events that led to our leaving it.
IN THE BEGINNING
We were so very young and idealistic, my husband Paul and I, when we accepted his sister and her husband’s invitation to help start a church in Oklahoma.
Of course, he would be the pastor and my husband would be the youth director/ second man and anything else he was needed to be.
Life was good for us at the time. We were living in Houston right next door to my parents. We had two very young children, a daughter who was nearly two and an infant son who was nine months. Paul had a steady job working for the Sugar Refinery in nearby Sugar Land and working some for my dad in his pest control business. The money was adequate and we needed the consistency a steady, fixed income provided, since we always had trouble managing our finances on the fluctuating income he was getting before from roofing and sodding.
Content and happy though we were, we had no real direction or purpose beyond the repetition of a weekly paycheck, a rather limited youth ministry, and family. We knew that we would eventually want a more satisfying, engaging, ministry-type occupation in the near future when we were invited by my brother and sister-in-law to help start a church in Oklahoma.They gave us two weeks to decide. At first, we didn’t think we were interested in moving to another state just to help start a church, but when all the pieces fell into place, we took this as God’s leading and accepted.
Two weeks later, we loaded up and headed sight-unseen, for the strange land that would become our new home. It is the place where we birthed and reared six more children, established a church, built a house, started a business and planted the roots of a lifetime.
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Cindy Foster is “Mom” to eight gorgeous, talented, temperamental, noisy, opinionated, alike-but very different kids. She has been married to their daddy, Paul, for 34 years. Cindy blogs at Baptist Taliban and Beyond.
Visit her blog at Baptist Taliban and Beyond
NLQ Recommended Reading …
‘Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment‘ by Janet Heimlich
‘Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland
‘Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement‘ by Kathryn Joyce