Quoting Quiverfull: Chastening Children

Quoting Quiverfull: Chastening Children February 20, 2013

Quiverfull leader, Jonathan Lindvall’s “consistent chastening sequence” … guaranteed to make every instance of “biblical discipline” last an hour or more. ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶

Step #1: Immediately Send Them to Privacy
Step #2: Require a Confession
Step #3: Express Grief (vs. Anger)
Step #4: Review God’s Required Consequence
Step #5: Administer the Physical Chastening
Step #6: Comfort the Child Affectionately
Step #7: Pray Aloud for the Child
Step #8: Have the Child Pray Aloud
Step #9: Plan and Give an Apology
Step #10: Require Expression of Forgiveness

Trigger warning for anyone who was raised this way … full article is here:

Bold Christian Living: Chastening Children

Comments open below

QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull honestly and thoughtfully.

NLQ Recommended Reading …

Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment‘ by Janet Heimlich

Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement‘ by Kathryn Joyce


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  • validated

    That list gave me chils and, frankly, made me a little sick. The further removed you get and the more you read from others, you realize how unsettling this stuff is.

  • validated

    ok, i just read the embedded link:

    “In fact, we all recognize that not all infliction of pain is abuse. Many medical and dental procedures cause temporary pain for the patient, and some might, in a moment of paranoia, accuse the doctor of abuse. But clearly doing something for someone’s own good is not abuse.”

    …what an asinine comparison.

  • JJ

    I read the steps out loud to my husband and he thought it was describing the way that this “Christian” man abuses his wife that we know! Think of a man treating a woman this way and it makes it clear how abusive this is.

  • SAO

    “Review God’s required punishment” ???
    Is God going to deliver a stone tablet like he did to Moses? Or is someone going to troll through the bible for a clear statement of how God would handle a kid who was being silly at the dinner table and spilled their milk?

    This is beyond sick.

  • Nea

    One assumes that the Biblical “requirement” is something taken wildly out of context and inflated beyond proportion, like spilling the milk=constant rebellion that deserves stoning at the city gate.

  • Tori

    “Step #10: Require Expression of Forgiveness” the rest is BAD, but this is the WORST. The whole thing made me feel slightly ill. My mother used to beat me with the metal tube from a vacuum cleaner, until I cracked and frantically begged her to stop. Frequently I was left covered in massive bruises, on one occasion the welt was bad enough that it broke open and bled. Afterwards she would make me THANK her for my “chastisement”. It took three failed abusive relationships as an adult for me to fully recognize the harm done to me. It’s not spanking, it’s HITTING, and hitting children is wrong and should be totally illegal.

  • validated

    Tori, that makes me so sad for you and i’m very very sorry you went through that. It’s NOT ok.

    My family didnt usually hit, it was more of verbal admonishment but it could be pretty brutal. I’ve been called “satan’s child” for example.

    I’ve been busy reading Mr. Lindvall’s other articles and they keep getting more bizarre as they go. But what is really scary is the realization that I grew up with people that believed the same crap but just didnt “look fundy”.

  • Saraquill

    I did not grow up with this sort of treatment, but I can say that when a person apologizes and turns around and makes you miserable AGAIN, their words lose meaning.

  • anon

    Argh, it drives me nuts that he still has not changed his website. He told a family member that he (Lindvall) has changed some of his beliefs over the years, did not recommend everything he used to, and was thinking of what/how to clarify things. Well, Mr. Lindvall, not only are you a thorough-going bully, you are also too much of a coward to change or admit to change.

  • Tracy

    Yes, this was a trigger for me. Literally feeling sick just reading over that list. How awful and hateful and hurtful. How vulnerable and unprotected a child feels when faced with that kind of “discipline” from the ones who are supposed to love and protect them. How devalued and powerless one feels. I clicked on the link to the full article but couldn’t get past the first part…too emotional, too many bad feelings. This is one of the many reasons I left the evangelical/fundamentalist movement.

  • JeseC

    #2 was always the worst one for me. Especially when coupled with the fear of God’s wrath for lying! What was the poor child to do, when a confession was demanded for an action you truly had not done?

  • revsharkie

    The more of these things I read the more grateful I am that I had the parents that I had. This thing reminded me of the knot in my stomach that I got when I saw the old movie “Night of the Hunter,” the one with Robert Mitchum as a supposed man of God who glommed onto a widow with children and proceeded to abuse them all, physically and psychologically. That was just a movie. I hate HARD that it is also some people’s actual, lived experience, and that it’s done in the name of the God I was raised to know as a God of love.

  • Persephone

    Just reading the list was triggering. But now it mostly triggers anger.

  • Tori

    Oh nor did my lot. The women all dress fashionably and so on. But I don’t even know how many cousins I’ve got anymore, and my cousins kids are multiplying at a crazy rate. Most of my family live in cities (mostly the same city) and “just have” big families (if anyone asks).

  • Stacey B.

    This was in the embedded link:
    “In fact, I do not allow my children to react dramatically or loudly to my chastening. They may certainly cry softly, but are not permitted to yell, scream, thrash, or run. Any such responses not only prolong the current chastening session, but will likely result in additional chastening.”
    Sick. Just evil and sick.

  • Rachel

    If your quiver is full of say, eight children, wouldn’t you spend most of your day Biblically chastising them? Hardly leaves enough time for Bible study. Also, how sick is it to hurt your child, then comfort them? Talk about sowing the seeds for the crazy harvest.