Quoting Quiverfull: Marital Sexual Consent Isn’t Real?

Quoting Quiverfull: Marital Sexual Consent Isn’t Real? May 24, 2014

by Free Northerner from his blog Free Northerner- Marital Consent

Marriage is a a contract between two people, in which love, of which sex is an implied and fundamental component, is promised to the other. This contract is vowed for life and is binding for life.

With sex being so vowed to the other, sexual consent is given for life by contract.

There can not be sexual non-consent in marriage for sexual consent has already been contractually agreed to.

Marital non-consent is an impossibility: if there is non-consent, there is no marriage; if there is marriage, there can not be non-consent.

Read the entire piece at Free Northerner

QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull honestly and thoughtfully.

Comments open below

NLQ Recommended Reading …

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement by Kathryn Joyce

13:24 – A Story of Faith and Obsession by M Dolon Hickmon

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  • That_Susan

    Maybe this is part of the reason why he isn’t married yet, at somewhere close to 30, in spite of wanting to start young and have a full quiver.

  • Nea

    No kidding. Can’t imagine why women stay away in droves!

  • Nea

    Binding for life? That’s a laugh considering that the fundamentalist divorce rate is the highest around. As for the toxic idea that “I want to with you” forever overrides ” but not tonigh/not that activity/you’re hurting me” — well, no wonder he’s still single.

  • He probably is the sort that would say: “Women today. They just don’t want a good man” if women choose (or their fathers choose for them) to stay away after vaguely getting to know him.

  • Trollface McGee

    You know your argument is in trouble when you post “Vox Day agrees with me,” like it’s a good thing.

  • KarenH

    I was just about to say the same thing; if he weren’t Patriarchal, he’d be a certified Nice Guy. You know the ones, creepy, stalkerish and completely resentful of the fact that none of the women pretty enough to catch his eye will come within 20 feet of him. Constantly complaining about how women “only want the assholes; none of them want a good, decent man like me.”

  • … and then to conclude that in order to get their attention, he simply has to act more asshole-ish.

  • I see one of the first links in his blogroll is a Vox Day blog. Birds of a feather…

  • Trollface McGee

    He’s an MRA, and a fundie. Which I’m surprised that there aren’t more of. I know there are some disagreements (MRAs like the idea of sleeping around more than fundies) but they agree on the core principles of female inferiority and servitude.

  • Well, that’s as good a reason to never get married as any.

  • rickharrell

    This is ridiculous beyond words. Any man who requires his wife to fulfill her “contractual obligation” whenever he tells her to is killing any semblance of love in his marriage. So to with the “if you really love me” line.

  • Independent Thinker


    In part of his blog his says the following: ” My degree is fairly worthless outside the government, so I don’t know where else I would get a job and I need a job to support the family I hope to have and pay the mortgage. I find myself lacking motivation, questioning my life choices……” Gee, I wonder why women aren’t beating down the door to be with this guy. Not only is he a premeditated rapist by his own definition, he blames the government for his career choices and by his own proclamation admits he is unmotivated. (Sarcasm alert) I am sure when a girl dreams of her prince charming a paranoid rapist who makes poor life choices and lacks motivation is at the top of her list.

  • Independent Thinker

    As a married woman, I see the concept of convincing yourself that your spouse will never leave as bad. If you realize your spouse has other options you might actually treat them with dignity and respect.

  • He even (mis)use the Bible for it. To quote from his blog:

    “The basis of Christian marriage is laid out in Genesis and reiterated in the Gospels. The man and wife become one flesh.

    Can a person commit a non-consensual act upon their own flesh?

    The very idea is absurd.”

  • That_Susan

    I looked up MRA but haven’t found a definition yet that seems relevant to what you’re saying. Can you clarify? Thanks!

  • Jayn

    Men’s rights activist. Who typically are more interested in bitching about and screwing (over) women than actually address problems men face.

  • That_Susan

    It looks like the correct definition is “Men’s Rights Activist.”

  • So-called “men’s rights activists”. Usually complain that fathers don’t get custody in divorce*, that divorce make it possible for women to run off with HIS children, HIS money and HIS right to sex. Many of them reason that if women have the right to abort and therefore not take care of a child, they should have the right to “financially abort” and not take care of a child if they choose not to.
    Some of them are pick up artists (PUA) who reason that if you just mistreat a woman the right way, almost any woman will fall for you. Others are Men going their own way (MGTOW), who say that women are too unethical and dangerous to pursue, and they are smart to avoid them.

    *When they actually ask for custody, fathers are slightly more likely to get it than mothers who ask.

  • Allison the Great

    Vox Day? Let me guess, another MRA?

  • Allison the Great

    This guy’s the type of whiney douchebag that treats women like shit and then is surprised when not even the “fat and ugly slobs” (a lot of these guys have really high standards when it comes to how attractive they expect their potential mate to be when they themselves are absolutely hideous and they don’t bathe) and then they complain about women as a whole (calling them whores, etc) when they’ve alienated every single one of them with their misogynistic attitude.

  • Saraquill

    I’m not a Christian and even I can think of at least one instance in Genesis where the “one flesh” was very much not between a man and wife. *grumbles*

  • It’s worse than you know. By stating that he’s outright stating that divorce is illegitimate. That there IS no divorce because the vow is binding until death. I can’t see how much more toxic than that you can get. The idea that making a decision under bad circumstances means you’re trapped *for life* without any recourse.

    If anyone needs to be marked as “do not marry”, this arse needs it.

  • Trollface McGee

    Yep, one of the more vile and stupid ones.

  • Jason Pearson

    “If you believe non-consent can occur in your marriage, you do not have a Christian marriage.”

    Yeah. I want to have sex in the elementary school playground, but my wife just won’t get on board. Guess I don’t have a Christian marriage, darnit.

  • I’d have wished less Vox would shut up, if he only stopped calling himself a Christian…

  • Suzanne Harper Titkemeyer

    Dukes, I just finished reading the manifesto of the young man in California that shot those people in Isla Vista and he sounds very much like this same author. Elliot Rodger seems to have the same thoughts/issues with women that Free Northerner expresses in his blog.

  • Free Northener is also a monarchist – he wants to be under a king (I assume not a queen). That is quite consistent with his view of women – he thinks some people being arbitrarily and for no reason given rulership is a great idea.

  • Petticoat Philosopher

    I don’t see hwo “Patriarchal” and “Nice Guy” are mutually exclusive at all!

  • KarenH

    Good point.

  • SAO

    No husband who promised to “love, honor, and cherish” his wife can demand or force unwanted sex without violating those vows.

  • Allison the Great

    I think it was on Vox Day’s blog too.

  • Allison the Great

    I read his blog, and you’re right, he is incredibly vile. He’s also a racist. He reminded me of Rushdoony.

  • Lynn

    Yeah, well. Marital rape was what eventually caused me to plan my own suicide and then decide that divorce was a lesser evil. According to this guy, the fault lies with me, but the bottom line is that my ex is alone, and one would think that would be a pretty good deterrent.