Quoting Quiverfull: Secular Men Don’t Take Any Responsibility?

Quoting Quiverfull: Secular Men Don’t Take Any Responsibility? December 2, 2014

manlymenby Kelly Crawford from Generation Cedar – Raising Boys Into Men: Tend The Field

Kelly sincerely believes only Christian guys are ‘Take Charge’. Too bad in reality it seems many ‘Good Christian Men’ are either bullies/tin plated dictators or apathetic blame shifters. There doesn’t seem to be many guys between those two toxic polar opposites in the church.  Another false charge laid at the feet of feminism by Kelly. Just like women, men are all different and run the gamut of ‘types’ Saying that a religious dogma makes men superior to others without the same beliefs is short-sided, childish and insulting to all men. Talk about man hating.

There is a gross misunderstanding by feminists and the feminist-minded that take-charge men are bullies. Some males are bullies, but those aren’t men. (Raising Men in a Man-Hating World)

Real men don’t abdicate or dictate, or wait on someone else or shift blame when things go wrong, or become apathetic. They take charge, they own their responsibility and they nurture those in their care. They emulate Christ who described himself as a shepherd. He owned his field. He tended his flock. The call to men is still the same.

QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, influential bloggers and cultural enforcers and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.


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  • AlisonCummins

    It’s called the No True Scotsman fallacy.

    No man is a bad husband.
    Michael Pearl is a terrible husband.
    Therefore Michael Pearl is not a TRUE man.

    Christians are kind.
    Debi Pearl is a christian and she is not kind.
    Therefore Debi Pearl is not a TRUE christian.

    All the marbles in the bag are blue.
    This marble is in the bag, and it’s red.
    Therefore this marble is not TRULY in the bag.

  • Baby_Raptor

    “Reality is what we say it is. If you disagree you’re not real!”

  • brbr2424

    That poster made me giggle. I don’t follow the Duggars. I’ve seen a photo of the son who joined the hate group American Family council. Marshmallowly man is what comes to my mind. From what I’ve read, the Duggar style cult is harmful to both goys and girls. Manliness is not a trait that flourishes in homebody hot house boys who are fearful and bible reading and don’t mix it up with other boys in society.

  • “They take charge, they own their responsibility and they nurture those in their care.”

    So … by this definition, then –

    1) I am a “real man” even though I do not, and have never possessed any Y chromosomes (at least, not to my knowledge); and
    2) My husband is also a “real man” in his role as stay-at-home dad.

    Since we have two “real men” in our relationship, my husband and I must be two gay men. Huh – who knew? I may have to rethink some things …

  • Catherine

    “They take charge, they own their responsibility and they nurture those in their care.”
    And women don’t?

  • Saraquill

    By that description, there is a huge deficit of real men in QF.

  • Women must be “real men” too. It’s the only logical explanation.

  • B.A.

    “Goys”–non-Jews? 🙂 Their cult is harmful to Jews,Goys,gays,girls,boys,and everyone else! I’m not trying to poke fun at you;I apologize if it comes across that way.

  • Trollface McGee

    Fundie men are the shining example of abdicating responsibility.
    Problems in their and their families lives are caused by but not limited to: feminism, gays, Obama, taxes, wives not submitting enough, children not obeying enough, Muslims, liberals, vegetarians, Buddhists, Satan, atheists, the IRS, Michelle Obama, apostates, environmentalists, and of course, demons.
    And yet, they expect to be in charge of everything around them.

  • Nea

    Gothard, Phillips, Pearl, Haggard, and Schaap (to name just a few) all were as glad to take charge (and tell EVERYONE that they were In Charge while in possession of a penis) — and not a man jack of ’em owns their responsibility without being forced by a secular government. Not one.

  • Allison the Great

    By your definition NONE of the leaders or men in your subculture fit your description. When they are weak sexually (when they cheat on their wives or prey on young girls) they blame women for their shortcomings. When something goes wrong in their household, they blame women. When something goes wrong with the world it’s because women aren’t submissive enough. Taking Charge means exactly that. It means taking responsibility for one’s own actions. I’d hate to break it to you, but your Christian Leaders ™ are incapable of doing that. That fucker who was masturbating on his poor nanny blamed his wife and the nanny. How the fuck is he a stand-up guy?

    Second of all, Kelly, you need to shut your nasty little mouth about secular men. Honey, you don’t even know any secular guys, so you don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about. Every single one of the secular men that I know, my father included, are 10,000x better than the assholes you’ve got in your fucked up little subculture. So next time maybe you should think about being able to back up your claim before going to your keyboard.

  • Jenny Islander

    I think it’s a case of informed attributes. Loudly announce that the men in your group perfectly fulfill this role that is held up as perfect manhood, except for when some woman tempts them to slip. Assume that it’s true, because people wouldn’t be saying it all the time if it weren’t true, right? Call anyone who points out the emperor’s wobbly naked butt a liar until the point when one of your real true manly men has to issue a fauxpology for wrongdoing that stinks too much to be hidden away any longer. Then you can begin the retconning reconciliation process and the Real True Manly Man can go and sin no more…in this jurisdiction.

    The willingness to believe in informed attributes is just part of the general obsession with image in this subculture. You can’t take the time to actually work on being somebody different because that would leave assorted bits hanging out. You have to be perfect now now NOW, or you are presenting a bad witness, or however they phrase it. (Also, in the case of Reality vs. Super Uber Leader Guy, it might mean admitting that women are sometimes better at some things than men.) Solution: Hypocrisy! And everybody around you has to exclaim at your beautiful clothes because they’re busy doing the same thing!

    It’s no wonder that conscienceless predators flourish in this environment.

  • The thought of the Duggar’s idol, Bill Gothard as a manly man reminds me of another manly man – J. Edgar Hoover.

  • P. S. I left an unfavorable review of the Mansfield book on Amazon. His godly readers trolled and harassed me to the point where I quit reviewing books. They then started harassing me on Twitter to the point where I suggested he ask them to stop. He did. They stopped harassing me on Twitter, but continued to harass me on Amazon for months.

  • Nicole

    I absolutely despise the “they’re not real (men, Christians, what have you).”

    Yes, yes they are. A man is a man (assuming he identifies as a man) whether or not he’s responsible, or irresponsible, a nice guy or an asshole, straight or gay, etc.

    If a person identifies themselves as a Christian, they are Christian…regardless of their actions and if someone else thinks they are a “real Christian.”

    Funny how Christians are quick to say “a real Christian would never…” and oddly enough, I’ve met very few “real Christians” based on that principle. Guess they are all fake.

  • ConcepcionImmaculadaPantalones

    **Looks in pants.**

    Hmm….nope, still all ladyparts down there. Guess I’ll just take my non-real responsibility-taking, friend-supporting/nurturing, in charge self back to the secular world where mostly everyone acknowledges my existence. 😛

  • katiehippie

    I gay agenda must be taking hold. 😉