by Shalom Pearl Brand from No Greater Joy – Preparing for His Obsession
Editor’s note: Remember when Debi Pearl confused hobbies and interests with obsessions? Her daughter Shalom is carrying on in the same vein of misunderstanding and reenforcing Debi’s message of supporting your man’s hobbies and not having any of your own.
QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, cultural enforcers and those that seek to keep women submitted to men and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.
Preparing oneself to be a help meet is a primary concern of every young girl hoping to become a wife and mother. She wants to be ready to be the best wife ever. I have never heard a young girl say, “When I get married, I am going to nag my husband until he hates me.”
No, we all believe we will be the best when that day finally comes. Then we are married and have one child after another, maybe financial troubles, or a husband that is too busy working to appreciate all our sacrifices. It is easy to forget our former commitment to be a good help meet (properly fitted helper). We are now stuck in the tired doldrums of nagging because we are unhappy with our lot in life. We forget that God created us to honor and respect our husbands, no matter what. We come up with excuses like, “If he would just do this for me or lead his family the way God wants him to, then I would be happy.”
Preparing to be a wife never ends. We must continue to learn and grow into what God has called us to be. We cannot forget to continue to prepare ourselves. I have seen many young girls get married with such joy and excitement, only to have their fantasy fall away a few short months later. Wives are shocked and become unhappy when they realize that he is no longer obsessed with just them as he was during the courting days and early marriage. Their husbands are now obsessed with video games, hunting, sports, some hobby, or just work. But as all of you veteran wives have learned, if you stand by your man, your life with him can become very rewarding.