by Biblical Gender Roles from Biblical Gender Roles.com – Can A Christian Wife Withhold Sex As A Way To Change Her Husband’s Bad Behavior
Editor’s note: This guy is so twisted up he’ll use any justification to say that all wives owe all husbands sex upon demand. It’s his hang up, and likely the thing he had the hardest time with in his first marriage. He never addresses the validity of issues that can lead wives to delay or deny sex. Is the husband lacking all basic hygiene skills, does he demand sex while she’s overloaded trying to do some household task or take care of a sick child? Is he emotionally abusive to his wife? There are lots of factors that can influence if a wife doesn’t feel sexual towards her husband at any given moment and in this guy’s world none of that is a reason to withhold sex ever.
A wife in the same way is not allowed to deny or withhold sex from her husband in an effort to reform his bad behavior. When a wife withholds sex from her husband because of his bad behavior in other areas – this is a textbook example repaying evil for evil and God will not bless such actions by a wife.
In fact when we look at sex from the wife’s role, this is just one part of her overall submission to her husband. God does not allow a woman to stop submitting to her husband in any area of her life (including sex) in order to reform his bad behavior – except if he asks her to engage in an immoral or sinful activity.
But doesn’t giving a husband sex when he behaves wrongly encourage bad behavior?
Many women ask this question, and I think Jenn is inferring it by her comments above. The answer is that it is never wrong to do what God has commanded, in fact it is ALWAYS right to do what God has commanded. Short of a husband asking his wife to engage in a sinful activity – she is always to submit to him (including submitting her body to him for sex).
In God’s view if a woman’s husband is treating her sinfully by neglecting his duties to her, she is to repay this evil behavior by blessing him with her continued submission, even in willingly giving her body to him for sex.
I know what I just said sounds CRAZY from a human perspective. But this is God’s way, not man’s way.
I completely realize that Jenn’s head is probably spinning right now and I truly feel for her situation with her husband. If she does not withhold sex, but blesses her husband with her body – freely and willingly won’t this tell him that everything is ok and she is fine with his neglectful behavior?
No – and here is the reason why. Jenn and any other woman can continue to bring her grievances about his neglect of her and her children. Nothing stops her from doing that. I think it would really make a man’s head spin, that his wife brings her grievance before him in a respectful manner in one hour, and later that evening willingly gives herself to him when he initiates sex with no attitude or hesitation. This can be a powerful tool for change in a husband, when he sees that his wife continues to submit to him, even though she has legitimate grievances with him.
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