by Elizabeth Wann from John Piper’s Desiring God – Helpers for Unfinished Husbands
Editor’s note: More of that ‘control your thoughts and attitudes’ from another female cultural enforcer. However I think Debi Pearl would massively disagree with this woman over what a helper’s role is in a marriage. This lady says that we can graciously confront and is implying that good patriarchs are imperfect! Imagine that!
Both wives and husbands are being shaped into the image of Christ in marriage. When we leave the altar on our wedding day, our husbands won’t perfectly be like Christ for us. God uses marriage itself to sanctify wives and husbands, so they can be like Christ to each other. It might take many years of sanctifying marriage for a husband to learn Christlike headship, and even then it will be imperfect. Wives, as helpmates, come alongside their husbands in this unfinished work.
We all know helping our husbands isn’t just child-rearing, folding laundry, cleaning a sink of dirty dishes, or preparing a steaming plate of food. We help our husbands when we study and love God’s word and when we seek to apply it in our marriage. Our practical service in the home is important, but we also practically live out the gospel in our homes through God-honoring attitudes, words, and actions toward our husbands.
Being a helper means we need God-given discernment to know when to encourage, when to graciously confront, and when to be silent and pray. When we fulfill the role of helper in marriage, it can be the catalyst for change in our husbands, so that they can live and lead like Christ. The role of helper is as much or more spiritual and emotional as it is physical.