by Biblical Gender Roles from Biblical Gender Roles – Reverencing, Ravishing and Rollo
Editor’s note: Last BGR for a while. His writings just infuriate me even worse than Michael Pearl’s. Here he’s answering the criticism of a Men’s Rights Activist (MRA) over his last piece we quoted here on how to enjoy sex with a wife that will not cooperate the way you like. The MRA man said that BGR and other Christian Beta Men (his words, not mine) failed to use appropriate ‘dread’ in getting sex from their wives. BGR goes on to explain that dread shouldn’t be used, but straight up fear should be used.
I do think there are other ways to invoke a healthy or “soft dread” in a woman from a Biblical perspective. One of these methods is the “there’s the door” method. If a wife feels her husband is afraid to lose her or that he is afraid of what she would do to him in a divorce (financial and child custody repercussions) then she will never have that reverence (fear) for her husband that God commands women to have in Ephesians 5:33.
So when a woman acts out in rebellion toward her husband and tries to act as if she does not need her husband or that other men would treat her better the Christian husband should tell his wife “there’s the door”. Will some women be foolish enough to walk out that door? Yes. But the moment a man allows his wife to put him in a position of fearing her, rather than her fearing him the relationship has just changed from the design God intended it to be.
And then there’s this little toxic tidbit. Thankfully not every man feels this way if my friends photos on Facebook are anything to go by. Which is why there’s a photo of a tropical dish garden someone received out of the blue from their husband on a day when they were struggling with their health, not groveling with unending sex for the husband. Decent men are decent to their wives no matter what the likelihood of sex is. BGR just does not get how toxic his beliefs about women are and that it’s very unlikely he’ll ever have a happy marriage if he keeps on this way.
QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, cultural enforcers and those that seek to keep women submitted to men and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.
So rather than a man pursing his wife by buying her flowers, taking her on dates and weekend getaways, buying her jewelry or just giving her more of his time he shows his wife that after and only after she does the right things – then these things come.
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