Editor’s note: Now we’re getting to the interesting part. Remember all those times Larry has referred to his permanently disabled wife? He’s now talking about that and the exception from the Lazy Wife rules if she’s is genuinely disabled. Tomorrow we’re skipping ahead to his 7 steps because Larry is being as wordy and verbose as always.
Disability is not the same as laziness
Now I need to stop here and give the obvious exceptions. If your wife is sick or somehow physically unable to keep up with the affairs of the home then this is not a matter of laziness on her part but rather the inability to do these things. In this case God has called us as husbands to lovingly step in and aid our wives.
For instance in the weeks before a woman gives birth she may be bedridden or she may be bedridden for weeks after giving birth or after other surgeries. Of course in these instances we as loving husbands need to step in and render aid wherever it is needed.
My wife was in a very bad car accident 3 years ago that left her permanently disabled. She suffers from PTSD, depression and anxiety in addition to chronic pain as a result of that accident. She cannot physically do everything she used to do. So I have no problem as her husband stepping in and helping wherever that help is needed.
I have been asked to write on being a “caretaker spouse” by many Christians who deal with this situation and I plan on doing that very soon. But I will just say that even if we as husbands have a disabled wife – it is our duty as husbands to both help them and also push them to do what they can be reasonably expected to do.
For example – my wife for some time did not do much in the months that followed her car accident and that was completely understandable. In the beginning I did not want her lifting a thing. But as the months progressed and we got into a year from the car accident after physical therapy her doctors said that her lying around all the time was not good for her. She needed to get up and move around and even force herself to engage in some light housework where she could even while enduring some pain.
I had to push her and sometimes we got into fights about it. But it needed to be done for the benefit of her spiritual and physical condition and the benefit of our home. Overtime as I saw she was able to do more I pushed her more. This is a tricky area when dealing with a disabled wife – but even in this case God wants us as husbands to exhort our wives to do whatever their best is in their current condition.
QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, cultural enforcers and those that seek to keep women submitted to men and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.
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