Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical, rational and the best possible solution, in other words 180 degree turn from Debi and friends always all spelling and grammar in the posting is unchanged from the original author.
I’m really bogged down with the relationships in my family; we grew up in a closeknit community and relations with people outside the family were built at the cost of internal bonds. So now we are all on the defensive toward each other; we can’t stand each other;(sorry for the crude language!) there might be mutual respect, (now that all 8 of us are grown up) but very little mutual affection. We don’t find it in ourselves to let each other close, much less into our hearts. Where siblings should have a kind of ingrained, natural love for each other, its just not there. I’m on of the oldest, and what makes it almost unbearable is my own struggles to “manufacture” this affection, on top of being the only one who is aware. The rest of my siblings, and parents, don’t, or seemingly don’t, see this.
This is a tough one, but something I think that both people in and out of Quiverfull deal with. It’s stunning on one level because many of the pastors and cultural enforcers or QF push the idea of happy perfect families being the outcome of living this lifestyle. This shows that is not necessarily true. The only answer this woman was given is a suggestion for a book. What would you tell her?
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