by Zsuzsanna Anderson from Are They All Yours? – So You’re Married to a Jerk?
Editor’s note: Last part. Zsu takes a swing at other ‘mommy blogs’, which is exactly what her site is too. Why is it that the others were all divorcing and Zsu is doubling down on the dysfunction? Swipe at psych meds? Check. But the most horrible part is bolded below. Funny how Zsu thinks you must stay married to an abuser or adulterer because if God didn’t desire you to be with him He’d kill off the bad guy.
There are several “mommy blogs” I used to read a few years ago, and when I visited them again a year or two after forgetting about them, lo and behold, they were in the midst of a divorce, or just through one. None of the cases I am thinking about right now were based on something egregious like adultery (which would still not make a divorce right), but were rather of the “he/she is a jerk and I’m sick of them”-kind. Reading about the impact these divorces have on everyone’s sanity, chiefly that of the children, is so sad I never can go back to those blogs. I have to ask myself – was it really worth it? So your husband was a jerk because he didn’t spend enough time with the kids, wasn’t funny and romantic, or bought birthday/anniversary gifts at the gas station after remembering the big day at the last minute – but why would you trade that for him never spending time with the kids, never doing anything romantic for you, and never again giving you any gifts? Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face. To top it all off, the children become depressed, suicidal, medicated, aggressive, withdrawn, and will grow up to be every bit like their parents when all is said and done, so for all that you still have to put up with all the faults you were hoping to get away from. Now you don’t just have to feel bad because of the divorce, but you can forever beat yourself up about having done this to your children.Unlike merchandise, spouses cannot be returned for store credit. Getting a divorce used to be as unthinkable as giving your children up for adoption because you are sick of putting up with them. It’s just wrong, no matter how bad they are.The only Biblical recourse for a horrible marriage, or any marriage for that matter, is death. If your husband is an abusive, mean, hateful, fill-in-the-blank jerk in spite of you doing your best as a wife, God can kill him whenever He wants to. If he is still alive, God must want you to still be married to him. A wife could pray and fast for her husband/marriage, and for the kids to turn out right in spite of marital problems. If nothing else, it will be a great lesson for the kids, who hopefully will grow up and make wiser and more careful choices regarding their future spouse, rather than learning that marriage can be dissolved at a whim.
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