Quoting Quiverfull: Part 4 – Questioning the Pearls

Quoting Quiverfull: Part 4 – Questioning the Pearls July 4, 2016

quotingquiverfullby Michael Pearl from No Greater Joy magazine – But I Wanted to Ask Mr. Pearl

Editor’s note: Here we go, super toxic Pearl speak. I wondered when he was going to start throwing blame and shame around. Apologizing to the family when you’ve been wrong is never a bad thing. I think it’s important for kids to see that even parents can be wrong, realize they are wrong, admit humbly that they are wrong, apologize to the kids and take steps to remedy the situation. But this thought that most churches are evil? Even if that is true this is sort of like the pot calling the kettle ebony.


Get the family together and announce that you have been a hypocrite and a religious bully, and you are deeply sorry. Tell them that you want to change and you may not do a perfect job at first, so you seek their patience and forgiveness.

The vast majority of churches are an evil that should be avoided. Maybe your husband has never been in a man’s church where sentiment or legalism are not dominant. Somewhere out of 100 or so churches surely he can find one that preaches the Word of God from a King James Bible and lives by grace and faith. You may have to drive 90 minutes, but it is worth the time and gas. Anyway, that is his decision. Remain flexible and follow his lead.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

moreRead more from Michael Pearl concerning rebellion in teenagers:

Homeschoolers Embracing the World

QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, cultural enforcers and those that seek to keep women submitted to men and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.

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  • SAO

    I think apologizing for being wrong is one of the most important things a parent can do. It models a practice you want your kids to follow. You can talk about why you changed your mind. I might combine an apology for anger with a discussion of why I was angry, such as, “I’m sorry I shouted at you, but when I’m afraid I’m going to miss a doctor’s appointment, I get stressed. I hate having to nag you to get ready.” Usually the kid in question will both accept the apology and recognize (without admitting it) his role in the situation.

    The thing is, the kids know when you are wrong. My kids were always far more resentful of things they perceived as unfair, regardless of how trivial, than of other issues..

  • Saraquill

    Is this a scheme by the Pearls to get more followers to visit them?

  • Nea


  • Friend

    “Remain flexible and follow his lead.” Did Orwell write that?!

  • Friend

    In more normal parts of society, I agree with you. However, Mikey is talking to a wife and mother. If a man had done these things, I think Mikey would praise his actions and ream him for questioning himself. But I believe he is accusing the female writer of usurping the man’s role. Notice that he wants the family to find the 1% of churches where a man can be a man.

    Speaking of which, he tells the family they might have to drive 90 minutes to find that 1% of Manly Churches. Are there 100 churches within a 90-minute drive of every house in America? I think this is a logic fail.

  • SAO

    Well, I figured this was more a case of a stopped clock which is right twice a day, than real insight from Michael Pearl. However, I think parents are too reluctant to apologize, fearing that they will damage their authority, when in reality, it’s damaged more by insisting something wrong is right.

  • Friend

    You’re absolutely right, parents should apologize when they recognize wrong. This mother (assuming the letter is real) might have been a bully.

    It’s always good to recommend a better approach, and that’s what you’ve done. I was only trying to decode, and heaven only knows if I was right.

  • Astrin Ymris

    It always amazes me when preachers/cultural enforcers who micromanage their followers’ lives condemn “legalism”.