by Kelly Crawford of Generation Cedar – Stop Being a Bully Over the “Purity Movement” Thing
Editor’s note: The unquoted part of this piece involves the recent backtracking author Josh Harris did on his courtship/purity model book ‘I Kissed Dating Goodbye’. According to Kelly here we’re supposed to just shut up about any problems the book/culture may have created for you. And it does create problems – look at the whole Josh Duggar mess and tell me that suppressing natural feelings and urges as sinful does not create the dualism and secrecy of sexual predators. If you have no healthy sexual outlets something very unhealthy is going to occur.
Another common response is, “That teaching hurt me deeply so we need to expose and beat up the teacher and my parents for buying into it.” The hurt might be real. Exposure may need to happen. But to blame with hostility is wrong.
Most of us could blame our parents, if blaming were viable and/or helpful, for “subjecting” us to the atrocities of modern dating. I seriously feel like I’ve had emotional damage from it. But to blame my parents? That is selfish and unfruitful. They were doing the best they knew to do at the time. They loved me. They can’t be held liable for every wrong direction.
So the absurd irony is that you have this new generation of parents trying so hard to help their children avoid the pitfall they fell in, trying to do better, trying to be better, and they get slapped in the face with “that hurt me and you’re going to pay.” For whatever the practices of courtship did to damage, it doesn’t touch the damage left in the wake of promiscuity, STD’s, and unplanned pregnancies. So being a product of the latter, I’m a little unsympathetic about that approach.
QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, cultural enforcers and those that seek to keep women submitted to men and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.
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