St. Valentine

Today is, of course, Valentine’s Day. In the wonderful book Common Prayer: A Liturgy for Ordinary Radicals, the preface to this day’s prayers reminds us:

A Christian priest in Rome (d.269), Valentine was known for assisting Christians persecuted under Claudius II. After being caught marrying Christian couples and helping Christians escape persecution, Valentine was arrested and imprisoned. Although Emperor Claudius originally like Valentine, he was condemned to death when he tried to convert the Emperor. Valentine was beaten with stones, clubbed, and finally beheaded on February 14, 269. In the year 469, February 14 was named as a day of celebration in Valentine’s honor. He has since become the patron saint of engaged couples, beekeepers, happy marriages, lovers, travelers, young people and greetings.

The hearts and cupids of this day bear absolutely no resemblance to this story, and you can be sure that no couple will remember, over a romantic dinner tonight, the venerable man whose devotion cost him his life. Perhaps that fact is not unrelated to how disposable modern love and relationships have become.

We have replaced love with romance as fully as we have replaced this Christian martyr with hearts and cupids. It is appropriate that we give boxes of chocolate on Valentine’s Day because that candy is as sweet and free of nourishment as most of what passes as love.

I propose that, on this day, we remember St. Valentine and his beaten, battered, and headless. That is what real love looks like. It is sacrifice, devotion, and giving all we have and are, even when it is painful, difficult, and inconvenient. Real love can’t be found until we pass through the hormonal attraction to a place where you are willing to give all you have for another person … and maybe even take out the trash.

by Michael Piazza
Center for Progressive Renewal