First Dream, Then Do!

June 14, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

I once knew a guy who loved to sit at home and talk about all the places he wanted to go and things he wanted to do. He talked about going to Paris and walking along the Seine while finding the perfect place to set up a coffee cart that would cater to tourists. He would start by renting a little flat in the Latin Quarter, find the right immigrants to buy the coffee beans from, and set up a little roastery. The next week he’d be mentally traveling to Morocco, or Madagascar, or Madrid, where he would start a business, and like a mustard seed, it would grow into a large company that would one day split off into a chain of shops. Read more

“You Have too Much… Character”

June 14, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

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We’ve all worked with and for people who either rub us the wrong way or that we love to be around. Many times, the people we gravitate toward have the same character we do. But what does having character mean? And why is having a good character important? When I was a much younger singer in the world of opera, I would do audition after audition after audition in hopes of landing one or two roles with companies anywhere in the world. During an audition, you put yourself out there. You are completely vulnerable to everyone in the room. Your looks, size, age, and deportment are being judged before you even open your mouth to sing. Then, when you finally are able to show what you have to offer, you are judged, compared, and ranked like a prime piece of USDA prime beef or scrapple. Read more

What are Happiness and Joy?

June 7, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

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What is “real happiness,” and when will you know if you have it? And what’s the difference between happiness and joy? These are age-old questions, and answers depend on who you ask. My grandpa used to say, “You’ll know happiness when you don’t have it anymore.” And a friend said, “I’ll only know joy when it kicks me in the ass and says, ‘Hey! I’m Joy!’” Read more

“Pray to Castro for Candy”

May 31, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

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Once, while we were having a Cuban chicken and rice meal, I asked, “Why did you leave Cuba? The raucous table ground to a silent halt, and the mother said, “We left because of Castro and candy.” My friend excused herself from the table, and one of her brothers went to check on her while the mother continued. Read more

Butker, Buddha, and Baal

May 23, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

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I love being right. And I’m willing to bet you do, too. But am I always right? Just ask my wife! You will get a response with eyebrows raised, a tight smile, and a reply, “He likes to think he is.” As much as we all want to be right in our opinions, perspectives, and moral perspectives, we sometimes need to take a giant step back and look at what we’re doing through the eyes of the person across from us and ask, “What’s their intent?” Read more

“Ya Know, Everyone’s Replaceable…”

May 14, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

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Many years ago, I worked in childcare at the local YMCA. I was going to school to get my teaching degree, and I thought it would be great to work with the kids I’d be teaching someday. As the Summer Camp Director and then as the School Year Childcare Director, it was my job to open the building at 5:30 a.m., Monday through Friday, go to school for my own course work, then return at 4:00 p.m. and lock up after the last child had been picked up. It was a great job. I’d plan field trips each week of the summer based on the week's theme. We’d have Pirate Week, where we’d watch a pirate movie, eat pirate food, and go to a local amusement park dressed as pirates. Or we’d have French Week, where we eat baguette and cheese for lunch, drink grape juice instead of wine, and go to a bakery for a tour (and samples) of French pastries. Read more

Anniversaries

May 10, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

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Anniversaries are all around us every day. We celebrate weddings, births, and life’s milestones with friends and loved ones. We memorialize dates and times of tragedy, loss, and death with gatherings of like-minded people to grieve and remember. So why do we do it? Why do we remember things from the past with reverence and sometimes horror? Read more

A Story of Quiet Hopes and Dreams

May 2, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

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We all have them—Mothers. We would not have been born into this world without them. Yet everyone has a different relationship with the person who gave birth to them. To some, Mom might be a best friend, a confidant, a person to be looked up to and admired. Others look at the person who bore them as a detriment, a judgmental enemy, a pariah. Then there’s a league of people who, after leaving home, never really think of their mother again until they receive that eventual call, “Your mother has—fallen/been hospitalized/died. Very few people are really blessed with getting to know their mothers well enough to know their hopes and dreams when they were younger. Fewer are ever allowed into the “Mommy shell” surrounding them. They will forever be the adult in the room, responsible for training and raising their child, even if the child is 20, 40, or 70. Read more

The Music of Life

April 25, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

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Scientists and poets alike talk about the harmonies of our world. Pythagoras married mathematics to music in the vast jumble of the vastness of the universe. Based on some of Pythagoras’s theories, Copernicus saw the planets revolving around the sun. All throughout scientific history, we find that when things are in harmony—as they should be—we have fruitfulness, goodness, peace. It’s when something comes along to break that balance and creates discord in a single instance that things begin to devolve, to break down, to turn against themselves. Read more

The Bible says We, “Gotta Love, Not Like!”

April 21, 2024 By Ben Bongers KM

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Not too long ago, a dear friend complained about a sibling to me and a mutual friend. This dear friend's sibling drove them crazy and said, “I don’t know what they think! They think I’m an idiot! I mean, I know I’m making the right decision. It’s not the decision they would make, but it’s the right decision for me!” Our mutual friend—who also has a strong-minded elder sibling—sat back, crossed their arms, and said, “Ya know, the Bible says we gotta love ‘em; it doesn’t say we gotta like ‘em.” Read more