Double Bind and Cheap Grace (Part 1)

In her essay titled “Oppression,” Marilyn Frye speaks of the perpetual confinement of oppressed groups. She writes, “One of the most characteristic and ubiquitous features of the world as experienced by oppressed people is the double bind –situations in which options are reduced to a very few and all of them expose one to penalty, censure or deprivation” (Frye, 150). Colloquially, the double bind forces the socially underprivileged individual to “never win.” Race relations provide a perfect arena for the double bind to manifest.

Within a dominant, majority culture/race/ethnicity, individuals in minority cultures/races/ethnicities can often feel discrimination or micro aggressions that constantly make them aware of their minority status. The minority may feel “outside the norm,” offended by statements made, constantly under a microscope where he/she needs to defend their position purely because it is different than the majority, and perpetually wonder if their marginalization is or is not due to their culture/race/ethnicity. Being part of the majority, and therefore the dominant “norm,” affords the privilege of not feeling perpetually marginalized or questioning what cultural/racial/ethnic identity has to do with isolation.

But here is where we find the double bind. The minority feels isolated, frustrated, and as if part of their core identity is constantly facing micro aggressions. To not speak up against these aggressions is allowing them, and therein isolation, to continue. Yet, in speaking up against the aggressions, the majority –i.e. the dominant “norm”- begins to feel frustrated and upset that the minority is offended. Statements often come from the majority like “it’s not a big deal,” “why are you so sensitive,” “you shouldn’t be so uptight.”

These statements inherently delegitimize and invalidate that the minority is hurt, offended, and frustrated in an arrogant way. Arrogant because the underlying assumption is that because I would not be offended in that way, you are being ridiculous to feel that way in this situation –disregarding any sense of social privilege. Thus the double bind is complete: if the minority speaks up against his/her isolation he/she is attacked for doing so and their experience is delegitimized, yet if he/she doesn’t, the aggressions that cause frustration and isolation continue.