Televangelist speaks of attack by 80 foot demons, satanic baby farms

Televangelist speaks of attack by 80 foot demons, satanic baby farms November 14, 2011

Notice how nobody else in the room seems to care… I mean it’s either true and “OH NO!” or she’s lying and “Lying is a sin, stfu!”

But you decide:

I can’t believe that the lady in the middle acts like that. She just heard about 80 foot demons attacking her friend.

First question: “I’m trying to relate 80 feet… well houses are like 40 feet… so it’s like two houses… okay go on, honey- it’s like two houses, we’re listening-“

I wish I was in USA right now, so I could call the phone numbers. This was recorded only a few weeks ago!

If you made it all the way through the video to the Satanic Baby Farm conspiracy theory, kudos. I mean, a Baby farm!? Really?!?

lolwut provided by: The Good Atheist

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  • danielrudolph

    I watched the whole thing because I was curious as to whether the farm was Satanic or the babies. Now, I wish I hadn’t.

  • Celeste

    I lost count of the lies. I had to stop at 5:48 because I just couldn’t take anymore. How can these people look themselves in the eye after spreading these bald-faced lies and claiming to be “good Christians”?

  • E. Cascook

    Oh my god! Jack-o-lanterns all over the place! Tear them down. She is in torment all over the place, bwahahahahahahahahah

  • Wow!

    Somehow I think the phone numbers on the screen during the bit about “If you want to be rich, give to God” are for you to give to THAT PROGRAM, yes? Are people really that gullible? Presumably there must be some, or they wouldn’t do it.

  • freebird

    Love the Yakety Sax when describing the “chase scene”. Made my day.

  • jufulu

    Better living through drugs. Just saying.

  • keith

    Insane lies aside, she is also not consistent? She rants about how costumes are all satanic, even biblical costumes. Then she tells an approving story about how some people dress up as demons at a church hell house. Once again, hypocrisy is ok if it is done for godder purposes.

  • Glodson

    I loved the idea that they might have been running in circles, in opposites directions, while being attacked by massive demons. Those are some shitty demons. Whenever I get attacked by demons in video games(where demons can actually be real), they kick my ass in no time. Where the fuck did they get these demons from?

    I hope they really did all that. I do. Just the thought of two grown people running in circles around a car in the middle of the night holding a cursed object warms my heart.

    Oh, didn’t they relate a story about how a cursed object spurred a killing spree in their scared fiction? I think it did. So, did crazy lady and her husband go on a killing spree in response to the cursed object as laid out by their divine fiction?

    And was the opening to the video the music from Mega Man? Anyways, loved the video.

    • Glodson

      Just throwing this out here, I’ve watched this thing twice now… And it gets funnier and funnier. I keep hearing parts that I missed thanks to laughter. Some nice people should lock this lady away in a place where she can get help. She needs it.

  • kraut

    That stuff is actually on TV?

    I thought they had abolished all locked mental institutions?

    I wonder what treatment did not work with those cooks.

  • And then Jesus showed up and was like “pew pew pew” and the demons were like “graaaaar” and Jesus was like “die die die die” and the demons were like “yaaaaaargh” and Jesus was like “get thee behind me motherfuckers” and the demons were like “boom” and there were demon guts all over the place and the crowd goes “haaaaaaaaaaa” “haaaaaaaahhh”!!!!

  • Mr.Kosta

    The gif you posted sums up my reaction quite nicely.

  • Michael B.

    So you can’t Christianize something pagan with Biblical figures… unless it’s a Christmas tree.

  • There’s something in the Kool Aid that she’s been drinking. I think it’s LSD.

  • Aliasalpha

    Notice how nobody else in the room seems to care…

    Perhaps its a relatively common occurrence, so much so that they barely notice. I suspect it started back in 1958 with the attack of the 50 foot woman

  • davidwindhorst

    Somewhere, four kids are sitting in a garage, pondering names for their death metal band, and going, “…80 Foot Demon? or Satanic Baby Farm?”

  • John

    thanks, all of you. I’ve been laughing my demonic arse off just reading the comments here. (I’ve always believed that humor is the surest measure of intellect) and yes, the Yakety Sax interlude will stay with us for awhile. Did ya notice how seamlessly they segued from Satanic Baby Mills (TM) to

    the wild, sexually subterfuged plea for money for this guy who lives on “seed” how much “seed” do

    these people require? Can we send them our stems too? I really just need the leaves….