A Scientologist Weighs in on the Challenges of Being a Parent

A Scientologist Weighs in on the Challenges of Being a Parent December 7, 2016

I wanted to share this article by Scientologist David Aden on his views on being a parent.

Anyone who has been a parent for more than five minutes knows that it is an ongoing balancing act. Am I too strict or not strict enough? Should I try to protect them from every little fall or let them learn themselves? Do I expect too little from my children or am I demanding too much?

That kind of ambiguity is built into the job because single-minded, single-shot solutions like the very old-fashioned “a child should be seen and not heard” might work sometimes but they never work all the time. That’s probably true in any area of life— fixed, unyielding “solutions” can fool us by seeming to “work” just often enough to be seductive, only to miserably fail in the long run.

That is never more true than when it comes to raising children. As a Scientologist of more than 30 years with two boys and now six grandchildren, I’ve experienced a few ups and downs and I’ve seen a range of approaches to parenting amongst my friends— Scientologist and non-Scientologist alike.

I’ve also made more than my share of mistakes as a parent. Given those mistakes, you can imagine my happiness when I discovered that whatever my failings were as a parent, as a grandparent I can pretty much do no wrong—no matter what my sons and daughters-in-law may think or say.

But, what of Scientologists generally? Does our faith impact our views on childrearing and, if so, how? As always, I can’t speak for all Scientologists—we are a remarkably diverse group, culturally, educationally, artistically and politically—but I can identify at least a point of orientation that in my experience most Scientologists consider when deciding how to love and help their children.

Scientologists believe that our fundamental nature is spiritual. We have a body and a mind but we are spiritual beings. For most Scientologists this belief lends additional emphasis to the way parents instinctively and naturally feel about their children: that they are unique, that they deserve our love and respect, that we have the happy privilege of helping them grow, learn about and understand the world in which they live and that we’d like nothing more than to help them find and fulfill their own purposes.


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