Navigating the Depths of Relationship

Fear Of Missing Out and Overcoming Fear of Missing Out

Fear of missing out, or FOMO, in a relationship, is a sensation or appearance where you feel like you’re feeling left out or that you might be missing out if you don’t have this relationship. It can happen to anyone.

Relationship fear can lead to anxiety, insecurity, and frustration. Let’s face it: relationships are challenging enough without fearing what we might be missing. Such fears can stem from social pressure, social media influence, past experiences, and our own insecurities. These fears can greatly impact our happiness and satisfaction with our relationships if they’re not addressed. Here are some ways we can overcome our fears of missing out.

Stop Comparing Yourself To Others

It happens whether we want to admit it or not. We’re all guilty of comparing ourselves to others. Maybe we saw something on social media that got us overthinking. Maybe we saw our neighbors, and their lives seemed so perfect.

Dwelling on such things can lead us to unrealistic expectations within our own relationship. Remember, each individual relationship has its own unique attributes. Stop comparing your relationship to the ones on television, social media, and, yes, even your neighbors. These relationships are not your relationship.

Dissatisfaction

Perhaps you’re feeling restless within your current relationship. Maybe you think something better is waiting for you just around the bend. It’s likely time to take a step back and consider where this feeling is coming from.

Is it from social media? Television? Perhaps it’s from those around you. Whatever the cause, you’ll want to determine if you’re feeling this way because deep down, you know that you’re in the wrong relationship or if you’re feeling this way because you’re comparing your relationship with others around you. You may wish to sit down with your significant other and have a frank discussion.

Difficulty Committing

People who fear missing out on a relationship may struggle with giving it their full attention. They may hesitate to make long-term plans or fully vest themselves in the relationship because they aren’t ready to settle down yet. Perhaps they are too young or wondering if there isn’t something better out there for them.

A relationship takes full maturity to flourish and grow. If you’re struggling to commit, you may not be as ready as you think you are for a steady relationship. Be open and honest with yourself and your partner.

Presence

A relationship requires you and your partner to be fully present in the current relationship. If one of you has wandering eyes or isn’t yet ready to commit, you’re likely not fully ready to embark on a relationship.

If you’re comparing your relationship to others or daydreaming about the ideal mate and know that the partner you’re with isn’t meeting your expectations or qualifications, it may be time to take a step back and work on some self-growth.

Overly Analytical

Many people are overly analytical. They may be putting everything under a microscope. Look for signs that something is wrong, even if there is nothing wrong with your relationship. It’s easy to become overly analytical.

Perhaps you’re comparing what you saw or heard on social media or television with your own relationship. Maybe you’re checking a quiz that you saw in a magazine. Regardless, you’re analyzing your options. This isn’t a healthy response to your relationship.

Validation

If you ask others their opinions about your relationship, you seek validation. Are you afraid you’ll miss out on something better? Are you attempting to reassure yourself that your relationship is as ideal as the one you saw with a neighbor or on social media?

If you feel the need for validation, you’re likely not as committed as you thought. Ask yourself why you’re feeling this way. Are you trying to get approval from someone other than your significant other? Why?

Conflict Avoidance

Perhaps you’re not addressing some of the issues you’re having with your relationship. Maybe you’re avoiding that important discussion you need with your relationship to take it to the next level. No one likes conflict, but sometimes, it’s important to open up the dialogue we need to discuss and be more open about.

Avoiding this may lead to the end of the relationship. It may also prolong the time it takes to move on with your life. Again, be open and honest; if it’s time to part, try to do so as amicably as possible.

Ignoring Red Flags

More than one relationship has had red flags. Sadly, when we ignore those little flags, we often lead ourselves into troubled waters. Whether the red flag is fear of missing out or a pet peeve of yours that he or she is constantly guilty of, it’s time to face reality.

Red flags serve as a warning signal to help us identify danger. Perhaps the person is really rude when you’re out in public. Maybe they are overly domineering or possessive. If you’re seeing red flags, it’s time to either discuss them or move on.

Indecisiveness

Do you have trouble making decisions? Are you impulsive? Do you tend to make decisions without first thinking them through? Perhaps the other person in your relationship does. Do you feel forced into a relationship?

Are you struggling to decide what is best for you and your partner? Take the time to have an earnest conversation, and don’t allow yourself to be forced into a relationship you’re not ready for. If you’re undecided, be honest and allow yourself the time to make the best possible decision or move on.

Idealizing

Do you feel that you’re idealizing others’ relationships? Maybe you see from the outside that their relationship is ideal, and yours doesn’t even begin to match up. The reality is you’re not in that relationship that you’re idealizing, so you’re not seeing the work that may have been put into that relationship.

Put your focus back on your relationship and stop idealizing. Don’t let idealization contribute to your feelings of dissatisfaction within your own relationship. It will make you and your partner miserable. Communicate openly with your partner, and if you see a happy couple, you wish you were more like, point it out to your partner and say, “They look so happy; I hope we look that way to others.” Or, “I hope we’re still holding hands when we’re that age.”

Take Away

Relationships are tricky and we often think that others have perfect relationships when we’re not. Remember, you only see one side of things, that public side. You don’t have a clue what may go on behind closed doors. You might think you do, but face it, you only see what they want others to see.

It may require you to seek therapy or communicate more openly with your partner to overcome your fear of missing out. Talk your feelings over, explore why you’re feeling this way, and permit yourself to enjoy your own relationship without fear of missing out.