Why do you care what other people think of you? As a recovering people-pleaser I’ve been asked that question a lot. The first thought that comes to mind is the admonition from my mother that I must always wear clean underwear. That way the paramedics and nurses won’t think less of me if I’m in a car accident. Someone reading this just smiled because his/her mother told them the same thing. I mean, “Huh?” If my underwear isn’t clean the... Read more
Do you ever get mired in a situation or conversation and then wondered how the heck you got there? I’m involved in a couple of organizations. I’ve served on many boards in the past few decades. One thing continues to be the same: Miscommunication causes major issues that should never have been an issue in the first place. The last time I was involved in a union contract negotiation setting I saw close friends divided on those kinds of issues.... Read more
How skilled are you in saying “No” to a request or opportunity? I have to admit this is something I’ve struggled with throughout my life. Perhaps you, too, have had those occasions in which you wanted to say “No,” but found “Yes” stumbling off your tongue. We can, in fact, even do this with a smile and demeanor that conveys the notion that we’re excited about it when it’s the last thing on earth we want to do. Can we... Read more
Has anyone ever asked you that? I remember my grandpa Jack yelling that at my grandma Esther one time. Her answer, as I recall, was something along the line of, “YOU!” Their relationship was fragile at best. Maybe you have started out your day very upbeat and happy. Suddenly – sometimes very suddenly – everything changes to the proverbial going to hell in a hand basket. Of course, everything is subjective and the outcome largely based on our attitude. Suppose... Read more
Have you ever been told you “need to get your facts straight?” I have. But in retrospect I have found that it wasn’t my facts that needed the examination. It was the opinion of the other person. And, in all fairness, I’ve definitely been on the other side of that conversation as well. My friend, Judy, recently turned me on to a quote by Daniel Patrick Moynihan. He said, “Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, not his own facts.”... Read more
Do you get enough rest? Perhaps you’re a working parent with two or more kids and a full-time job; that would be a “no.” Maybe you’re working full-time plus attending college to finish a degree; another “no.” Or, you might be maintaining your home life while working full-time, as well as caring for an elderly parent and helping your young adult child through university; and that makes three for three. I hear from readers all the time that there just... Read more
Are you just a secretary? Mechanic? Waitress? Just anything? Those are such degrading statements and have, in the past, made my blood boil. For me the two I most often get are, “So you’re just a flight attendant,” often accompanied by its evil cousin, “Oh … so you not a real minister then, are you?” Though it used to be a major issue for me, such comments no longer faze me. I take those remarks as examples of small, uneducated... Read more
Are all of your expectations met? I mean, all the time? Probably not. If your answer is “yes,” please call me? I want to interview you for next week’s blog! Sometimes our expectations can have outcomes that are so far off base all we can do is laugh about it. That happened to me a number of years ago. I got into a conversation one day about my work as a minister with one of the staff at my gym.... Read more
Were you happy to see 2014 end or was it so terrific you just wanted to see it continue? Either way, it’s over and we have already begun 2015. What will the New Year hold for you? The answer to that question may surprise you depending on who you ask. That brings me to our topic, Perspective. Have you ever noticed how the media often reports the news and then backs up the story with a poll or survey? No... Read more
What sort of traditions do you have? While we experience our personal, family or cultural traditions throughout the year, it seems the winter holiday season often hold the most cherished or memorable. Do you attempt to re-create those traditions year-after-year? If so, how do you feel when something (or someone!) doesn’t live up to your expectations? I’ve been traveling a lot lately. The massive decorating that happens at our home in December has fallen on the rest of my family.... Read more
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