A Reflection On Forgiveness

Two hands reaching to touch in front of a sunset. — Photo by mododeolhar: https://www.pexels.com/photo/people-reaching-hands-to-each-other-5795688/

“Forgive but Don’t Forget”

This is a principle I grew up hearing all of the time. In other words, one is able to forgive someone, yet you must learn from this instance and keep a record of wrongs in order to keep tabs on your relationship with one who wrongs you. It’s forgiveness, with a bill that is wracking up credit. It’s disregarding someone’s action towards you, but keeping a list of people in your mind to watch more closely.

I get the principle. And obviously we must be aware of people who seek to swindle us, abuse us, and misuse us. Yet, for everyday occurrences in the work place, the class room, or the sports team, this kind of “forgiveness” is nothing but a toxic reality. It breeds distrust and kills relationships. For this article I simply want to look at a few examples of how we are to look at forgiveness. This is not an exhaustive list, but I hope that it is both challenging and encouraging to you. Let’s begin with the Lord’s Prayer.

Forgive Us Our Debts

In the Lord’s Prayer (also known as the Our Father) there is a line that reads like this:

“And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.” (Matt 6:12)

The idea that is communicated here is that God is forgiving the debts that we owe him because of our sin and thus we should forgive others. As we wrack up a bill at the dinner table that is more than we can pay for, the restaurant owner forgives your debt because it’s been paid by another. Jesus paid our debts to God, and thus we should forgive others because of this forgiveness that was shown to us.

This is a different kind of forgiveness.

Let’s Take a Look at Matthew 18: 21-22…

In this passage, Peter famously asks Jesus “How many times should I forgive my brother.” Peter asks if he should forgive 7 times. Jesus continues on to say “Don’t forgive your brother 7 times. But 7 x 77 times.”

In case you’re trying to do some quick math, allow me to spare you. That’s a lot of times. And I think this drives home the point that Jesus is making. We should forgive as often as we breathe. The way that we forgive is a tell-tale sign of who we are in Christ and where our true allegiance lies. Our lack of forgiveness towards others tells a story of bitterness. A lack of forgiveness shows a heart of callousness.

Perhaps there is a time where processing is needed. Of course there is. But forgiveness and reconciliation is always the goal for a believer.

Forgive as often as you breathe.

In Colossians 3:13…

We see a charge from Paul to the church community in the city of Colossae. This charge is wrapped up in the “how-to” portion of the letter that often follows his theological foundation in the beginning of the letter.

In other words, Paul is saying “In light of all of this theology, here is the praxy.”

Starting in verse 12, we see that as God’s chosen ones, we are to be compassionate, patient, meek, kind, and humble. We are to bear with one another and to forgive each other if there is a complaint towards someone.

This forgiveness emulates the Lord’s forgiveness towards us. Without forgiveness towards others, we misrepresent how the Lord treats us and reconciles with us. As His body, we are the primary representative on Earth of His Kingdom. We should act as such.

In Matthew 5: 23-24…

Jesus shares a scandalous message to the people during his most famous sermon: “The Sermon on the Mount”. He says that if you are going to the altar with a gift or offering for sacrifice and have an issue with someone, then you should leave your gift and be reconciled before consecrating said gift. Jesus communicates that reconciliation and relationships with one’s brother and neighbor is holy and is worthy of attention. It is worth so much attention people were to leave their offering to the Lord at the altar in order to mend the relationship.

In 1 John 1:8-10…

We see a shift from the focus of the last couple of passages that we’ve seen. 1 John 1:8-10 reads like this:

“If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

Did you know that you are sinful? That you’ve sinned against the living God? I know I have. We serve a God is faithful to us and is just to forgive us. He is the one who sacrificed His Son in our place so that we can be reconciled to Him. That’s the heart of the the Gospel. We are able to be forgiven if we confess our sins to Him. Make a habit of Confessing your sins to the Father. He is just. And He is able and willing to forgive you.