Finding the Sources of Unhappiness In Your Life

Finding the Sources of Unhappiness In Your Life August 10, 2020

There’s a reason why many feel unhappy. It’s because we’ve been taught we are imperfect. Whether it’s how we were raised, the social customs we follow, or the influences of our belief systems; it’s important to isolate the primary sources of our discontent.

Happiness is letting go of the ideologies and beliefs that keep your mind captive. / Image by Foundry Co on Pixabay.

When you think about it, from the day you were born external forces in your life have been conspiring to turn you into a certain kind of person. Your parents and family members have certainly played a key role in defining who you are. The education system you attended also helped chart your destiny. And social and cultural norms also influenced the person you became. Yet, there are other forces at play – more intrusive – that have laid the foundation of inadequacy within us all.

Look within yourself to the ideas that are holding you back

Look around. Everywhere you turn there are institutions and systems offering to lead you down a path to find a better you. Take religion for example. What’s its primary role? To lay down a foundation of inadequacy by teaching people to believe they were born bad – or worse, evil.

Philosophies can also have a heavy influence on our psyche, because they attempt to show us hidden forms of esoteric wisdom that invite us to escape our own humanity. There are also many schools of meditation, yoga and other ancient paths to enlightenment that vie for our devotion. But these paths also seek to purge individuals of their own natural human characteristics. I.e., they teach us that the very qualities that make us human represent a lower form of existence, and we must escape our humanity in order to reach a higher level of being.

And not to be left out are the many other paths to perfection we can find at the local strip mall. From cannabis stores to pharmacies, liquor vendors to athletic clubs, and fashion boutiques to franchises offering the latest materialistic diversions; these all promise their own brand of perfection. The only reason we buy into what the conglomerates are selling us, is because their marketing campaigns have successfully convinced us of our own inadequacies.

What all of this sets up is what I call an attitude of escapism. Escapism represents a false premise about life that we’ve been nurtured on since birth. Which is to say, that the goal of humanity is – ironically – to escape being human. Whether by joining religions, learning philosophies, following gurus, or fixating over our physical appearance; we have come to mistakenly believe that happiness is acquired by achieving perfection.

Erroneous ideas can keep us bound to a way of life we want to escape. / Photo credit: Image by Comfreak from Pixabay

I’d like to suggest an alternative. True well-being is available to everyone who is willing to accept that they are human and they are fraught with imperfection. (In fact, I’d argue that it’s our imperfections that make us all uniquely original.) Yet, we must learn to value and accept our own humanity — both the good qualities and the not so beneficial ones that might be detrimental to our well-being. And, we must also learn to be tolerant and permit others to be human as well.

NOTE: This post is part of new series offering insights on Meditation for Freethinkers, which will be posted each Meditation Mondays.

About Scott R. Stahlecker
Scott R. Stahlecker is the author of the novel "Blind Guides, “Picking Wings Off Butterflies,” and “How to Escape Religion Guilt Free.” He is a former pastor and previous owner of several hospice agencies. “I’ve spent roughly thirty years as a freethinker. Among the many things I’ve discovered is that there’s few non-religious websites that offer optimistic discussions about free thought; about its benefits for individuals and societies, or tips on how to develop freethinking skills. Which is why I created Thinkadelics; to engage with others on a range of topics — from newsworthy posts to in-depth features — which best articulates the joys of being a freethinker.” You can read more about the author here.

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