Philosophy Gags

Philosophy Gags May 18, 2020

Time to share some philosophical jokes. Here’s my philosophical joke, the only one I remember consistently:

A travelling professor enters a philosophy faculty. He sees all the students really pander to and look after this one particular professor, giving him all his needs. He finds this odd and asks one of the students why they are looking after this one professor so well.
“Aah, he’s a solipsist. If he goes, we all go.”

***

How many Freudians to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to change the lightbulb and one to hold the penis.
I mean the mother!
I MEAN THE LADDER!

***

Is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?

***

  • Question: how many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?
  • Answer: fish.

***

And a few others I have here and there. I love this one:

15 Best Philosophy memes images | Philosophy memes, Philosophy, Memes

Dean, to the physics department: “Why do I always have to give you guys so much money, for laboratories and expensive equipment and stuff? Why couldn’t you be more like the math department – all they need is pencils, paper, and waste-paper baskets. Or even better, like the philosophy department. All they need are pencils and paper.”

***

Seeing the zen master on the other side of a raging torrent, a student waved his arms and shouted out, “Master, master, how do I get to the other side?”

The master smiled and said, “You are on the other side.”


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