Silly God, voting is for kids! (updated)

Silly God, voting is for kids! (updated) June 11, 2011

I find professional sports and professional politics to be very similar—if not identical. For one, neither is very serious. Like Trix: they are for kids. One of the most deleterious effects of the anti-culture we find ourselves in is this developmental inversion: adults are treated—and behave—like children, and children are expected to be more like adults. Grown men and women spend their lives playing games, divided by plastic, petty rivalries and addictions that have been built for our cheap, self-destructive entertainment; children are denied the art of play, the wild outdoors, and the simple joy of innocence. A clear sign of this analogy between the childish enterprise of professional sports and politics can be observed every time each side invokes the name—and will—of God for their own self-righteous benefit.

I can sympathize with this feeling. I have often felt as though losing a game of football or a rugby match would produce such suffering to my innermost being, that God had to intervene on my behalf. I have prayed devoutly that God help my team win (no matter what) or even that I catch a fish. I am sure that other people, on both sides of the aisle, pray feverishly for their favorite to win—or for their rival to lose.

While I am sure that both sides do this kind of thing in the heat of battle, the GOP is a bit more honest about it. (The Dems are equally laughable and superstitious, but their smug secularism prevents them from making this particular point.) New York Magazine recently ran a witty article titled, “God Caught Backing Multiple GOP Candidates for President.” In it, we find that three presidential hopefuls of the GOP (Herman Cain, Rick Santorum, and Michele Bachman) have all indicated, in some form or another, that their political ambitions are guided by a master plan, ordained by God. What becomes difficult is when God endorses more than one candidate for the same position. Maybe God is hedging bets. That God, always trying to please everybody.

What this reminds me of is obvious but jarring to those—myself included—who are blinded by their small-minded partisanship, tribalism, and childishness: God doesn’t vote. God is not rooting for a team, a party, or a nation. At this point, someone might predictably try to misinterpret me as saying that God is indifferent to politics, that God is unmoved by politically-motivated evils (like genocide) and the legislative, judicial, or martial power that might bring an end to perversity and suffering. Let me be clear: I am not saying that God is a political agnostic. What I am saying is this: what we call “politics”—the 24-hour news feeding, rabidly fundraising, “gotcha” soundbyte monitoring, vote manufacturing thing—, that two-headed monster of U.S. politics, that is the one that is disinterested, not God. We are the calloused ones.

Because of the sportslike childishness of our politics, God has no party, no country, no “team.” It’s just too childish. God is not a Democrat. God is not a Republican. God is not an American—not from or for the U.S.A., Cuba, Canada, Honduras, or Brazil (all in the Americas).

Is God even Catholic? Why would God be a Catholic?

God’s will is beyond Bush, Obama, and warlords of the future. God ‘s politics are serious, holy, mysterious, and excessive. Just because God isn’t rooting for a team or politician doesn’t mean that God is against them, nor does it mean that God just doesn’t care. Again: we lack care, love, and the desire for real change and conversion. Not God.

To those who think that God will be voting for their pet party in November or at least ensuring that their side wins—or that their home-state team wins tomorrow night (Go Mavericks, beat Miami!): Don’t be silly, voting is for kids.

*Update: See? I told you so! ESPN reports that Lebron James, after losing to the Mavericks, wrote this on Twitter: “The Greater Man upstairs know [sic] when it’s my time [to win a championship, presumably]. Right now isn’t the time.”


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