This Holiday Season, Prepare to be Disappointed!

Nothing like a light uplifting read, right?

Before you run the other direction, rest assured, this isn’t a “doom and gloom” article. In fact, quite the opposite!

Let’s face the facts: sometimes, plans change unexpectedly.

Especially during this busy holiday season.

How do you handle it when you have to cancel or adjust your holiday plans?

‘Tis the Season

to be sickly…fa la la la la…

If you have kids, I can almost guarantee, some time between now and the New Year, you’re going to get sick. And, it’ll probably be at the most inconvenient time.

You know that big family Thanksgiving gathering you’ve been looking forward to all year, with Aunt Betty’s melt-in-your-mouth stuffing or Great Uncle Jerry’s award-winning apple pie? Yeah, your kid’s going to throw up all over you the night before, and you’ll be stuck at home all week instead. I mean, hopefully not – but it’s happened here and likely will again at some point.

We’ve missed Thanksgiving dinners at GG’s house…

My kids have been curled up on the couch with fevers on Christmas morning…

Oh, and New Year’s? We got to the point that we quit making plans on New Year’s Eve, because for 3 years in a row, our family ended up getting sick that day and had to cancel our plans with friends. So, now we just plan to stay at home as a family and play board games – which might be my favorite way to spend it anyway 🙂

Home-Bound Holiday

Sometimes the best memories happen spur of the moment, unexpectedly, unwelcomed, and unplanned.

A couple years ago was one of those years where plans changed last minute. The day before Thanksgiving, my daughter woke up in the middle of the night with a high fever.

Trying to wrap my brain around what this meant at 2 in the morning was not pleasant. At first, I was in denial. “Maybe our thermometer’s broken…?” as if I even needed a device to tell me what I knew the moment I kissed my daughter’s scorching forehead.

I couldn’t go back to sleep wrestling with the implications of this. I hated canceling our plans with extended family. Holidays, traditions, and gathering together with family mean so much to me! I could hardly acknowledge to myself the reality of the situation… much less, break the news to the kids.

Waking up that day, I had a choice: mope around all day, or make the most of it!

I was determined to do the latter!

Instead of contributing a dish or two to a large family feast, the entire meal was up to me now.

So, I grabbed some cold brew, hopped in the car, and ran to the store for everything I needed. While my daughter rested, my son helped me in the kitchen. He learned that he loves peeling potatoes (which is great, because I despise it!)

Things came together, though the day looked much different than normal.

We missed our extended family members, the large gathering, and a few favorite dishes. Yet, as I sat at our small table with my very favorite people, my heart couldn’t help but feel full.

The day was quieter, calmer, and slower than normal. It consisted of bonding time in the kitchen, board games around the table, and the kids dancing to Christmas music in the living room.

It’s not how I would have planned it, but it’s a holiday memory I’ll never forget.

Making the Best of it

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be sad when plans change. It’s normal to grieve the experience and people you are missing out on. There’s something incredibly special about being around loved ones and celebrating together. I’m not making light of that.

As moms, we often set the thermostat for the rest of our family’s emotions. If we spend the whole time complaining or unhappy because of what we’re missing out on…that’s how the kids will remember the day: “it was miserable!”

After acknowledging the change and sadness,  we have to adjust our mindset. We have to learn to adapt to the situation we’re in instead of yearning for a different one.

Just a couple weeks ago, my family got hit with a stomach bug (here’s hoping we got it out of the way before the holiday season this year!) It came out of nowhere, and on a week when we had several fun days in a row planned.  While it wasn’t a holiday, we missed going to the movies, family dinners, church, and a day at a family fun center we were all looking forward to.

At first, there was disappointment, tears, and kids in denial. Yet, it’s as if they shortly forgot about the things they were missing. We spent the days at home together, playing games, painting at the kitchen table, watching Christmas movies with hot cocoa in hand, having dance parties, baking cookies, snuggling by the fire, etc. It was honestly, a sweet week together as a family, despite us taking turns not feeling well and the changes in plans.

New Holiday Memories

If your plans get interrupted this season, whether by sickness, bad weather, or something else entirely… whether on a major holiday, or a random Tuesday… let me be the first to say, “I’m so sorry“. I know the feeling of disappointment well.

I’d like to encourage you though, to try your best to make positive memories, within the situation you find yourself in. Do something you and your family enjoy- whether it’s baking together, playing board games, watching movies, etc.

It won’t look the same as what you had planned, but it can still be a special time, where you slow down and connect with one another, creating new memories.